Boredom

"Honey," I said, looking at the floor, "I love you, probably will always love you. But I can only believe you don't want a marriage, at least to me."

Sally gave a harsh gasp and started to talk, but I just ignored her and kept talking.

"We discussed what we thought marriage meant before we ever got serious back when we were dating. At the time, I thought I was making a male concession to your womanliness. We agreed that when two people make a lifetime commitment it was a covenant. No open marriage as such a marriage obviously meant a major part of that which was part of the promise was being withheld, constancy, chastity, call it what you may. Our thinking then was that each partner must be committed to fulfilling the others needs. If that couldn't be done, we agreed we had to talk. If those needs were agreed to be reasonable we felt the one not performing must be unwilling or unable to really commit themselves to the marriage. If one partner couldn't or wouldn't meet the others needs it would be time to seriously consider whether we should stay together." I raised my head and just looked at her.

Breaking into sobs, Sally buried her face in her hands. "Vernon, I love you! Please, I'm sorry! We can talk and you can help me! Please, Vernon!"

"Sally, have I not met any of your needs? Have I been an inadequate husband?"

She violently shook her head no.

Tears were coming to my eyes, now. I tried to ignore them.

"Sally, I trusted you implicitly. I wonder now how long it took me to wake up, but I'm sure you have been using your trips for 'excitement' for some time. I'm not asking you to tell me when this started. I certainly do not want a history. How long you have been stepping out doesn't really matter. The fact that you have been does matter. I couldn't believe the evidence I saw, and was so ashamed at my doubts that I felt I had to prove my suspicions false."

"Sally, I was there when Conrad Jones met you in Phoenix. I saw you get on the elevator. I was the one that placed those calls you didn't answer, and I saw him walk out of the hotel many hours after the two of you went up to your room. He looked refreshed and like he had just stepped out of the shower. The next day you told me he was never in your hotel room." Looking at Sally, I watched the tears streak down her cheeks.

"Sally, I was in the lobby when I called you night before last, when you told me you were so tired you were going to go right to bed after having dinner in the hotel restaurant. I was in the lobby maybe forty-five minutes later when you came down with Randy. I was parked in the steak house parking lot while you were having dinner with Randy, and getting a bit smashed. When you went to the bar I followed you in and watched you dance and make out with him. A woman there pointed you two out as such a grand couple. She said he had picked you up the trip before this one, and it was so marvelous to see two people so much in love. I was in the coffee shop when you and he went in the elevator. Everyone that saw you two was wondering if you got to the room before you had sex, most of it out loud and snickering. I checked out Randy's car, found his home phone number and called Barbara, his wife. She told me she was holding the lonely fort down while he wined and dined an important client. It was I who made those annoying phone calls while you were 'performing' for Randy in your room. I was the one Randy threatened with an ass kicking for disturbing a lady. What time was that, Sally? It must have been 2:00am." Then I just sat and looked at my wife.

Her face was ashen, and tears were flowing down her cheeks. "Vernon, oh god I'm so sorry. I don't know why I did it! Please, it will never happen again. You are my husband; you are my love. We have built a life together, and that is what I want. Our life together is real life to me. Somehow I thought what I was doing was play and it would never be part of my real life. What can I do to make it up to you? Anything, just tell me!"

"Woman, I can't think of anything that could to it at this time. You got bored and your curiosity for someone else's little fleshy tube made you betray me completely. A man invades a woman with that tube. When we say he 'takes her' it is appropriate. You have told me many times to 'take you', to invade, to conquer you. When a woman spreads her legs, she is opening herself up to his invasion of her body. There are some women who act the dominatrix. They in effect are assuming the traditional male role. That is not you, you have been allowing yourself, my most precious 'possession' to be owned by another man. I have carefully, sometimes it seems painfully, kept my vow to you and have kept your man solely yours. I agreed, and still agree that the man is every bit as much a possession of the wife as the woman is of the man. I have kept that vow."

Looking her in the eye, I added, "I have to ask, Sally. You have never indicated I was less than adequate in bed; or in any other areas of our life together for that matter. You led me to believe it would be impossible to satisfy you more than I could, yet you have introduced some refinements to our sex life. I don't find that bad, but I wonder now where you found those new little touches. Have I really been inadequate for you?"

Sally sobbed, "No, Vernon, never. You are the best lover I have ever had. I just got bored being away so often. Please honey, what can I do to make this up to you? Just tell me. I will never do anything like this again! It was just something to fill the time, it just happened. I love you, have never loved anyone but you. I don't think I could ever love anyone but you."

"Sally, I can think of nothing now that would allow me to trust you. Thank heavens there have been no children. I will be moving out as soon as I can find an apartment. Luckily for us, we have been living on one of our salaries and banking the rest so there should be no financial pinch for you, or me either for that matter. But now is not the time to discuss splitting our assets. For the record though, when that time comes I would like to make a fifty-fifty split."

I drew in a shuddering breath, "If you are serious about trying to repair the damage to the marriage, we can keep in contact."

Continuing, "If you are serious about somehow saving our marriage, don't date. I won't make any such promises for myself, but you already know I can keep my pecker in my pants. At the moment the idea of any kind of 'relationship' with anybody makes me feel cold all over. Your track record for staying off your back is a whole lot worse."

"Sally, I'm going to go out for a walk. I can sleep in the guest bedroom until I find an apartment. Maybe later today we can go to the bank and set up separate accounts, at least for savings. But we can work out the details later, if you want."

Then I grabbed my coat and left the house for a long walk. I didn't want her to see my tears.

* * * * *

Sorry about the lack of sex, but it didn't seem to fit in the story. And it seems a lot more powerful without it. If you have read any of my stuff in the past you already know the sex is there if it fits. Those who like Troubador stories don't read it for the sex but for the emotions.

This point seems a logical point to stop; I really don't see any way to repair this union. Some of you will disagree. As with all my stories, I am eager to hear your input.

I've said this before, a dog licks the hand that feeds it, but the same dog also licks the hand that beats it. Let me get my licks in whichever way you think fits.