Painful Beginnings

I awoke as the light crept into the room, feeling the warmth of Della's body alongside mine. I gazed at her and she stirred, one eye opening slowly then closing again.

"So it wasn't just a dream," she said, the she snuggled into me and kissed me on my lips.

"No, sweetheart, it wasn't just a dream."

"If it had been, it would've been the best dream ever. Now make love to me again please, honey."

"How's you're pussy feel?" I asked.

"Great, but empty. Fill me again please."

"Breakfast is self-service, darling." I rolled onto my back, feeling my cock already hardening due to her presence. "Help yourself."

She propped herself up on an elbow and looked at me, then tossed the covers off, seeing me in all my naked glory with a nearly full erection.

"Ooohhh, I like what's on the menu," she grinned, lowering her mouth over the head of my cock.

Her tongue felt wonderful as it moved over my head and I reached down to feel her pussy. Sopping wet already. This girl was hot to trot already.

"Straddle my body and then sit on me," I instructed.

She did, sliding her body on top of me, her hard nipples pressing into my chest as she tried to find my cock head with her pussy. After a while she did and wasted no time in sliding down my body as I felt her love tunnel engulf my cock. She moved back and forth for a few strokes, then stopped and drew her head back to look at me.

"Teach me what's good for you, darling."

I reached for her knees and pulled them forwards, bending them until she was squatting over me. I then pushed her shoulders back, causing her to sit up. She soon got the idea.

"Ooohh, he goes in further like that. Mmmm, I like it."

I held her hips and slid her body back and forth, feeling my cock sliding in and out at the same time as it stimulated front and rear of her tunnel. She took on a look of intense concentration as she processed the feelings. Once she had the rhythm, she pressed her hands against my chest for leverage and balance as I cupped her breasts with my hands and began squeezing her nipples, gently at first, then harder as she became more aroused.

"Oooohhh, honey, that's soooo good. I'm feeling like I need to pee again, so I guess I'm close."

I was feeling close myself as my cock was totally enjoying the sensations of her tight vagina massaging my cock while she drove herself harder and faster onto it. It took only a few more strokes before she leaned backwards and went rigid, biting her lower lip as her body trembled and shook in orgasm. She was wonderful to watch, her perfectly gorgeous young body in the throes of the most enjoyable feelings known to women. I lay there, soaking it up, storing away the memory as she gradually came down from her peak, leaned forwards again and opened her eyes.

"You are wonderful," she said, "That was fantastic."

"I just lay here, I replied, "You did all the hard work."

"Well, I hope I'll have more opportunities to work hard like that. What now?"

"I really need to cum. I got so close but fortunately you came first, so now I have my second wind, you ready for more?"

"Oh yes, darling, like this still? I love this position."

As she said that she began moving back and forth again, then stopped and began moving up and down, rising until I was nearly out, then dropping quickly to re-engulf my cock completely. Over and over, rising and falling while I continued to stimulate her breasts and nipples. I felt myself approaching my release, a few more, two more, one, then I was there and thrust my hips upwards as I poured my sperm into her hungry vagina. She gazed down at me intently, watching my face as my orgasm washed through and over me. Then she began the back and forth movement again, sending more spasms of through my cock. It only took a few of those strokes and she also reached her second orgasm of the morning, this time lying forwards onto me as she quivered against me, her vaginal muscles contracting and relaxing as they pumped the last of my cum from my deflating member.

We held each other for a long time, gently kissing and cuddling as we relaxed and enjoyed each other's presence and love. After a while she raised herself up a little.

"This is lovely, darling, but I really do need to have a pee now."

She rolled off me and stood, making a quick exit to the bathroom. I waited till she'd finished then also emptied my bladder and turned the shower on. We both stood under the warm water, each washing the other, paying attention to the really important bits. I felt myself becoming more aroused, my cock uncharacteristically standing to attention and wanting more. Della began massaging it, then I lifted her with my hands under her ass cheeks, pressed her back against the wall and lowered her onto me, feeling my cock penetrate her recently opened vagina.

Della nestled her face against my shoulder, enjoying the feeling of being penetrated under a stream of warm water. I began lifting and lowering her in time with my thrusting hips, fucking into her from this new angle as she moaned gently as her arousal increased once again. It only took a few minutes before she reached yet another climax, clutching at my slippery shoulders with her fingers and she raked me with her nails. Again I felt her clenching muscles on my cock, but I had nothing for her and simply held her as she came hard, then I slowly lowered her to stand on the floor.

"That was nice, sweetheart, thank you. Did you cum?"

"No, not that time. Guys don't need to cum every time; sometimes they save themselves for later. Women can cum and cum and cum some more, but men run out of cum juice after a while and it can take time for it to replenish."

"So that's it for the weekend then? You mean I need to find a new supply?"

I laughed. "No, sweetie, I'll be right for tonight, if you want more, that is."

"Want more? I want all I can get and as much as I can get all the time. I want to fuck my life away with you."

"Well, I hate to break the bad news, but that won't be happening. Sorry. However, we'll have tonight then you'll be well prepared to find your own lucky boyfriend."

I turned the shower off and we stepped out, dried each other off and walked out to the kitchen naked. Fortunately, the windows were well-protected from prying eyes and she told me she thought it felt so freeing to be able to walk around naked. "I can see why you liked nude sunbathing," she commented.

"I still do," I replied, "We both can later today if you wish, our balcony is very private and I'm not expecting visitors."

After breakfast we returned to the sunroom and remained naked as I continued my story for her and her recorder.

"In the last two years at school I went on two outdoor trips organized by a club for school students who wished to take part. The first one I hated. We stayed in a cabin in the woods and did all sorts of things out there including exploring a cave. I vowed I would never go on another trip like that again. The following year I again volunteered for the trip and this time we explored a different cave where we needed to climb down then later up a wire ladder. I was terrified of heights and had to be lowered down the ladder, but I had to climb back up as I was too heavy for them to simply pull me up. It was totally terrifying. I vowed once again to never go caving or on another trip like that again.

"I left school the following year and joined the outdoor club which had taken the two trips I had hated. Part of me said I was crazy, the other part knew better; it was a way to escape from home for weekends and to challenge myself. The only reason I mention this is because this is where I met my first girlfriend.

"I'd been kissed by a female non-family member before. During the school holidays I often went to the local swimming pool where there were, of course, girls. I had a strange attitude towards girls, having been in an all-boys school, with all male teachers, having a brother and no sisters. The only female in my life was my mother, and by now I fervently wished she wasn't. Anyway, one of the girls at the pool, Lisa I think her name was, for some reason I forget came home with me. We found ourselves alone in a room and she came up behind me and kissed me on my cheek. How to respond? Well, I didn't. I simply looked at her strangely, wiped my cheek and walked away. I never saw her again. I've always wondered what would have happened if I'd thrown my arms around her hand kissed her back. Guess we'll never know.

"But in the club I joined there was a girl about my age with whom I seemed to spend a lot of time. I didn't plan it like that, but looking back I'm pretty sure she did. The club had an old bus that had been converted to a sleeper by placing planks of timber across the seats which were down each side, and covering the timber with mattresses. We would be collected by bus on Friday night and taken on the four-hour trip to the cabin, so the passenger were able to sleep on the way. Vicki and I used to lie next to each other on these trips. It was night time and therefore dark, it was also cold, so we would throw a blanket over us and lay side by side, but we didn't sleep. For a start we kissed, quietly but increasingly amorously. As we got to know each other better, we explored each other's body with our hands. She'd hold my cock, through my underpants, while I'd stroke her pussy, through her panties. I was allowed to cup her breasts under her bra, but was not allowed to put my fingers under her panty elastic.

"Our relations remained at about that level until she took me home to meet her parents. I was apparently quite acceptable to them so our relationship got the green light. Shortly after that, Vicki moved out of home into an apartment by herself. I helped her move in and she invited me to dinner a few nights later. We ate dinner, listened to music (it was the 60s and we were both into the folk revival, early Dylan and the protest songs of Joan Baez and Pete Seeger) and sat around an talked. I left and went home at around 10pm. Apart from a kiss hello and goodbye, we never touched each other the whole evening. It's only recently that I realized she was wanting something more from our relationship and had set the scene to take it to a whole new level. I didn't pick up the clues. I don't know if she was a virgin or whether she was on any form of contraceptive, but I certainly was a virgin and knew nothing about contraception at that stage. Perhaps it's just as well nothing happened. After I went home I masturbated to relieve my sexual tension, then went to sleep wondering what the whole visit was supposed to mean. I never saw her again after that night. The only thing I heard many years later was that a news report stated that her parents had been killed in Africa. I sometimes wonder where she is and what she did with her life."

I sat quietly for a few minutes, lost in the past. Finally, Della broke the silence.

"That was sad; funny but so sad. I don't quite know how parents could even think that they were preparing a child for life without the basic information that you were lacking. Anyway, I'm interested. What happened next?"

"Well, club trips didn't run every weekend but now I was an adult, with a job, I really thought I needed to get away from my parents every weekend. Home was an intolerable place for me. I bought an old van and rigged it up as a sleeper in the back. With that I went away with a few friends to the cabin on weekends when there was no club trip. After a while I had a huge bust up with my parents. At age 19, I was certain that I didn't need to be strapped for any sort of misdeameanors so when that happened I fought back. I won, then I left home and went to live with my grandparents. Sometime about them my van was written off after a car failed to give way and struck it on the side. Fortunately, nobody was seriously injured, but now I needed to get away in a different manner. I joined another hiking club and went away on a trip with them, where I met a girl named Elise and surprisingly, for me, asked her out on a date.

"Actually, it was funnier than that. We were sitting eating dried fruit as we took a break and she passed a packet of dates to me asking if I wanted a date. 'Sure,' I replied flippantly, 'Next Saturday Ok?'. When she agreed I was totally amazed. We went on our date and saw one another quite frequently after that. She was looking for a place to live so I suggested I move home and she could move in with my grandparents. That worked fine; I'd spend every evening at my grandparents' house chatting with Elise. Over time our chatting progressed to us both lying on her bed fully clothed, then we rearranged our undergarments slightly and I would run my cock between her legs on the outside, or so I thought. It felt great for me and I came each time, my cum being collected on a towel between her legs. Again there was no contraception, but then, we weren't technically fucking.

"She was quite religious and was adamant that she wanted to remain a virgin till after she was married. We talked about marriage and finally became engaged. At some stage during these visits my cock must have inserted itself into her vagina because by then time we did marry she was not a virgin."

I paused again, thinking back to the disaster of a marriage.

"Lucky her," said Della with a grin.

"Yeah, maybe. She went on the pill and we got married and went on honeymoon. The first night she didn't feel well, what with the excitement and everything, so we slept in separate beds. The second night we were on a sleep in a train; single beds and I was not allowed to share. Then we ended up in a port city where we were booked on a ship for a cruise before we returned to our new house. Again, the cabin in the ship had single beds. Once we arrived at our destination we stayed with some friends of hers and yet again, single beds. We drove to our brand new home and for the first night since we were married we slept together in a double bed.

"So, I'd been married to her for over a week, had never seen her naked, had not been permitted to have sex with her in all that time. Looking back, I should simply have had the marriage annulled but I didn't know about that then. At least once a day I'd masturbated to relieve my sexual tension; imagine having to do that on your honeymoon! She would always wear pajamas to bed, not sexy, slinky ones designed to be removed, but fluffy, frilly ones that were designed as some sort of armor. And she'd go to the bathroom fully clad, shower with the door locked, put on her armored nightwear, then climb into bed next to me, turn away from me and go to sleep.

"At some stage in these proceedings we must have made love because we had a daughter. Conceived while she was on the pill, and two sons a few years later. I had a good job and was moved around the country a bit, but I realized that our relationship was well and truly on the rocks. One night I went home after work and there was a note telling me she had left and for me not to try to find her."

Della looked at me, a look of horror on her face. "She left, with no word, nothing? You must have had some inkling of her plans surely. Anyway, what was life like for you during that marriage?"

I thought back to those unhappy days, then continued.

"I was always very angry, I think. Possibly that was justified, possibly not. My upbringing had been filled with physical punishment so I slipped into that mode; I knew of no other way. Occasionally when I became so frustrated that I completely lost my cool I would strike her, but always on her fully-clad ass. I don't know really; the whole seven years seems like a blur and is certainly a time in my life I would rather forget. I had no idea she was leaving, none whatsoever. I was busy working, trying to make ends meet.

"I changed jobs because the first job I had was well paid but required huge time commitments outside normal working hours. I was on stand-by every weekend and it really did my head in. I took sick leave, was put on sedatives, but eventually resigned and found a less stressful position in scientific research, but at far less remuneration. I think that financial pressure was the final breaking point for Elise.

"Anyway, after I returned home to a note I was devastated. My whole world collapsed around my ears. I packed a few things and drove to the beach house where my parents were for the weekend. I went for long walks along the beach alone, but made no mention of what had happened until they finally asked what the problem was. I told them, dissolving into tears as I informed them of the unhappy marriage I had tolerated for all those years and the absolute devastation I felt after Elise left. Looking back, it seems ironic that I should have been so upset that she took matters into her own hands to solve an obvious problem; I should have been grateful. My parents, of course, were old-time, hard-line people. They simply told me that it was all her fault, which I knew it wasn't, and she would have to be made to return, which I wasn't sure I wanted.

"I knew she wouldn't return to the house while I was there and I knew she really needed to be there for the sake of the children, so I had to leave. That was a mistake, from a legal viewpoint because her divorce lawyers repeatedly claimed that I abandoned her because I left the family home. I needed somewhere to live and fortuitously my workplace had a hostel for employees, so I rented a room there, crammed all my belongings into our station wagon and shifted out of home.

"Elise and I filed for divorce but before that could happen we had to visit a marriage counsellor. That was an unmitigated disaster. Instead of us both sitting in front of her and telling our side of the story, the counsellor called her in and heard what she had to say, then called me in and dressed me down for being such a lousy husband. I never even got to tell my side of the story. Clearly the situation was completely irreconcilable so we were granted a separation.

"At the hostel I sank into deep depression. There were a lot of guys there and a few young women as well in a separate wing of the huge old building. There was also a well-established drinking culture, which I was drawn into. I found solace in the bottom of a bottle, almost every night. I became an alcoholic. I worked with alcohol as a solvent. I developed a routine of pouring myself a beaker half full of 95 percent alcohol, filled it with water and that would last till morning break. A second one lasted the rest of the morning and a third dealt with the afternoon. Then it was back to the hostel for dinner and off to the tavern for the evening before I poured myself into bed and slept, to repeat the process the following day.

"Weekends were different; I drank less during the day but Saturday night was a time to make up for that. I remember one Sunday morning we were scheduled to cut firewood for the hostel wood fire so I was woken bright and early at about 8am and staggered out to the utility where a few of us shared the tray while others filled the cab. Once we arrived on site, a guy handed me a beer bottle which, out of habit I put to my lips, took a swig and almost swallowed -- chain saw oil! It took a while to get rid of the taste but it sure woke me up.

"My view of the young women in the hostel was that they all had panties I wanted, no, needed to get into. However, as I now know, neediness can be detected easily in people and most young women seem to be particularly adept at avoiding those who make their needs obvious. I had to make do with my faithful right hand. However, there was one girl, Carol, who turned out to be 18, who was from a farming background and would sit by the fire in the cool evenings as winter approached and spend her time knitting. I sat beside her one evening and asked if she was knitting me a jersey. She gave me an appraising look and replied she wasn't, but she would if I needed one, but it would cost me. I asked how much, and she told me 'A night out'. I bought the wool and she began the task. We decided on a night for payment and I booked a table at a dine and dance restaurant, one of the best in town at that time.