My works are perverse, lurid, and unrealistic. That is because I am a pervert. You shall find no romance here, no tales of love or redemption nor accounts of good men and virtuous women. The wares I peddle are bawdy, crude, and vulgar, for that is the way I like it. That is what I sell, and for the price, what I sell is good...
For I, dear customer, am a pervert. And, chances are good that if you are reading this... then so are you.