All Comments on 'The House Husband Ch. 06-07'

I didn't care for the beginning of this story: I was a single father and had to work and take care of the kids, house, etc. alone and managed to do it whereas the protagonist here struggled when all he had to do was take care of the kids and the house while his wife worked, which would have been an easy gig compared to what I had to do. That said, the wife in this series was a shrew and deserved what she received, so I liked the ending from a plot standpoint. I also liked the "coven" of supportive housewives - that was kind of funny and could have been developed further. Reasonably well written and interesting story.

the story held true to form, kids are ok...househusband came out smelling like roses and FG88 goes on to submit another good story. TK U MLJ LV NV

some loose ends were tied up; but there was no real explanation as to why the change in Anne? Had she divorced him when he was employed, SHE would have gotten the kids, the house and his money...so why did she wait?

Throw in the way he discovered her affair and it is obvious you were just trying to wrap things up, regardless of how fucked up a story this really was.

I'm just glad it's over so I don't have to read it HOPING it will get better.

Very good story. You improve by writing. Please continue this way. If all she wanted was out of the marriage and custody, she could indeed just have divorced him. Since she obviously didn't want to pay alimony and most probably didn't really want the children as they cramped her intended lifestyle, she made the mistake to push him too far. Like he discovered, her exit was started long before when she squirreled away part of her income. So, all's well that end's well, for him at least. Just wonder if she made it as a pornstar.

I was so worried that he was going to get hard on while seeing his wife with other men and wind up giving in and living as a cuck.

Thanks for not ending it that way.

I enjoyed the story.

From hapless house Frau to collecting damming evidence for diivorce in demon of efficiency mode . Well for the sake of the kids. , I'll buy it . You know the scary thing was that he was saved by the wife's blatant transparency . She telegrafed every punch she threw.One can only surmise wifey never perused 'The Art of War'. If she had been halfway subtle; custody, house and bulk of money accrued as family would have been hers.

How in the world does one prosper in business world with demolition derby mode of management? Be that as it may I enjoyed this serial and note the author's increasing skill at tightening up plot holes and not resorting to drastic mechanics that requires readers to suspend belief as in previous stories. My thanks to him on that account. He's come a long way by my standards.

It also would have been nice to read how the lead character managed in replacing dastardly wife and the trepedations that must have been inherent in the process. In terms of closing the book on Anne ; it's enough to say ' it was time'. Wonder if as a journalist she went on to work for Murdoch? Hmmmm.

House Husband or not, atleast be a fucking man....gave it 4 stars

I liked the development of the story. Very sad at first but finished well. You got me with all the cliffhangers Thanks for the final chapter that resolved the story without seeming rushed. This chapter got 5 stars. Thanks for writing

The end of this story was better tnan the preceding parts. However, it still left me feeling unsatisfied. The way the wife was dealt with was too brief and lacked depth.

I always wondered why men had to call locksmiths to change a few locks on their house. Small wonder the wife runs around on them!

At least the author gave him back his spine. The author's style of writing does not allow the woman to get her just deserts, but at least she lost in the end.

But I still think he let the quilty off light.

I think you had a different ending planned and caved and just used this one because you knew how most people thought. Why people use kids in these stories is what i don't understand and in real life either one of the two main characters would be run out of town if a person with salt knew what was going on.

So much better than the earlier sections

After everything she did her retribution was to look Huanted. Clearly she didn't care about anything else or even cried or you would have told us in the story. Major let down after investing our time in this story. However every writter has their style and that must be respected by us readers

With good twists and conflict. I only have two suggestions for your future endeavors (and I hope there will be more):

1: Gordon's Coven was a great plot device in the early story. If you had used it more in the later chapters, it would have added more heart and more character development to the crescendo.

2: like so many authors, you give the wife short shrift. A part of *my* interest in these stories is to see the conflict in their minds as well. Your women tend to be hollow shells, and we rarely get a chance to see the heartache their poor decisions cause them. Here, it was summed up as a "haunted look" I know I'm only one reader, but consider exploring this aspect of the loving wives genre.

Thanks for your efforts and keep up the good work. 4*

Wulf

The dialogue sounded forced, or artificial - if you read it out loud it sounds like a english text book, not how people speak, IMHO. Many thanks for writing, looking forward to more.

I liked your story, but she got off far too lightly, for all the things, that she did, over the time frame, of the story. The coven showed that all women, are not as heartless, as his wife,to a man's plight, when he loses his job, through no fault of his own. Also there the matter of the men exposing themselves to the children. Seven months sentence just doesn't seem long enough, for indecent exposure toward children, even though they were asleep.

Thank you for a very good story

I'd like to see something five or ten times longer to fully explore all the different intrigues - develop his harum - the one guys foxy daughter - that guy's shady business dealings - more development of the wife....

My only disappointment is that it's ending. I truly enjoyed every chapter. Thanks for writing.

so they were happy until 6 month ago ?? not really replicable, of course you can get dumb ideas and so on but I never in the whole story saw anykind of love from her part. not towards the kids and for sure not towards the husband. so why were they together ? this part is completly missing and makes the story unbelievable

the rest in nicely done

A definite improvement over your first two stories - however, the number of typos, misspellings and cut/paste errors is still much too high. It definitely detracts from the story.

After a slow start in which you left me confused about the story line, you've organized the story well and provide a very good continuation and finale to it.

One suggestion: I didn't realize that the beginning of the story took place in England, until it moved to Paris. In future writings, I'd suggest that you Place the Story: providing the reader with information about where it's taking place, the geography encountered, season of the year, the weather, and other associated features.

Start to finish, this story works out will. For a bit, early on, it was looking like another wimp husband tale, but it was salvaged, and very well, in this last submission.

If I heard anyone say they were going to stand next to my kids with erections they wouldn't know what struck them. Stand there and collecting evidence you have to be kidding.

I'm glad the boy finally grew a pair and kicked her to the curb.

I wasn't sure how this story was going to finish, but the ending was what I was hoping for.

Thanks for the good story.

I agree to others' suggestions to improve your story. Nevertheless it was a good read for me. Thanks.

But some comments from my side:

- she got off far to easy, there should have been more pain in the end for this selfish slut - there is no reason to treat her as a victim.

- as with many other stories on this side I would like a sequel written from her POV. Why was she married to him at all? Did she ever love him? (obviously not, because she secretly saved money to get away) How and when did the whole affair with her boss begin? What made her decide to scheme against her husband? What did she learn from the video he gave her in the end?

- as many others pointed out, there were some promising angles of the storyline that should have been worked out more - esp. the "coven"-thing and the obvious emotional nearness of the kids to him alone. Had the mother really been such a gould caregiver when she was at home before?

Not going to nitpick but will thank you for the time/effort to write and share it with us!

...and undefined. Long story for that.

It is a good revenge story from Europe. I am glad for this.

The detective work done by Gordon was very good. In the end, I was glad to see that Pat, Jim, and Simon were all prosecuted and convicted.

My problem with the story was with Gordon. I was pissed off that after he had the video evidence about the blackmail, that he didn't grab the children and go. He may not have been able to get them that night, but he sure could have nabbed the kids the following night, when the wife and her friends went down to the bar.

He could have gone back to England that night, and given all the evidence to his solicitor and the police, and then drove back to grab the kids.

the fault in this breakup is shared 60/40 yes she is /was the driver but he was a willing enabler. shared fault is the most likely conclusion. good story need a little more Brit curb.

I have forced myself to read all of your submissions and conclude that you should stop contributing. All the main characters are far too similar in personality and physical looks. The exchanges between them are not far off identical. So are the plots.

Chapters 5&6 of Captains Year are beyond belief, bordering on vomit making.

Take a break, a very long break!

She assumed that her plan was going to do it for her,

and nice to see her fall on her knees. If something more could have been done to her, I don't think i would mind. The kids got the best possible deal, and that is ok too.

He was a very lucky man in the end. With stones he would have taken charge again without being emasculated.

If you, the author, are as sick as your stories you really and truly need to get psychological help before its too late.

The story was sappy enough without having to wade through bad typing and editing.

Are Brit "public" schools responsible for the apparently sad state of responsible, adult males who deal well with Brit females?

never to mess with bean counters. TK U MLJ LV NV

from your ignorance of the British I assume that you're American - nevermind I'm sure you're otherwise a decent person. (in spite of your heritage)

Yes the state of American marriages is clearly a beacon for the rest of the World. As for the writing well that Shakespeare knew a thing or two about relationships.

liked it gave it a 5.

"1" !

Quite possibly the most stupid paragraph I've ever read on Lit

"'I must go now or he will be in here wanting to know what I'm doing. I can't wait to feel your tongue on my clit, you really are the best, better even than Gordon and he is good in that department. See you tonight, Love Anne'

I sat back and reviewed what I now knew and drew up a plan of action.

First, I needed top get to Paris and try and get some definitive proof of her affair."

The email is proof positive of the affair

Gordon not only saved his balls he caught all of her cheating and manipulation and threw it right back at her. With any luck she'll die soon with all the people she fucked around with.

ALL CHEATERS SHOULD DIE IN HORRIBLE PAIN

Oh Yeah

She definitely was a scheming, manipulative slut the last year of their marriage but when the private bank account she had where she squirreled away her income hiding it from her family that had occurred for a number of years. She was the type of woman who when questioned about something she wanted to avoid she grew angry and lashed back consistently. She was basically a shrew who in the end put her own sexual lust and fantasy above everything else in her life. The stupid bitch was headed toward a internet porno career because of her very poor choice in friends.

Considering how scheming she could be, she got away to lightly. Not acceptable.

Shallow and inane. No writing tallent whatsoever! It could not be any worse.

This mindless prattle is worth this-- "1" !!!

are educated enough to spell 'talent' correctly.

the conclusion was better than the convoluted and contrived storyline. It would have helped if some, or any, of the characters were believable. Other than that, it was so-so.

There is no way that you read all those chapters so quickly. You left comment after comment within minutes of each other. What a jerk.

don't want to bust your logic, and i use the word in its broadest possible interpretation to include what you think and write, bubble, but a lot of people will read the entire story and then only comment once they read it all. so that can account for comments on each chapter close to the others in time. don't give up your day job.

He should have known. Not a bad read, although I had issues with some of the things he did throughout the story. He shouldn't have participated in the first swap and near the end he NEVER should have revealed he knew her password. A few others, but overall not a bad effort. One big complaint? His new girlfriends name is BABS???? How very American of you!

This story had too many opportunities to exert control on an out of control situation.

Could he have been any blinder? At least he worked it out in the end. I might have preferred the ex-wife get a little more punishment, but I guess having to give him the house, the kids and pay him child support was probably punishment enough. Maybe he should have traded some visitation time for time with her in the stocks and him with the cane.

... I really do not see how anyone could have enjoyed this series of stories enough to "favorite" it!

Just having your Spellcheck engaged should have eliminated most of them!!

Then, of course, if you had BOTHERED to proof-read ...........

what a great mother she was and in the next paragraph he talks about her leaving the kids alone, if you do not have the interest to proof read your own stories why ask people to read them. As for the idiots that favored this story go away.

Sure took him a long time to catch on when it was beating him over the head with the obvious.

A fitting ending to a twisted tale. Thanks.

One fingered typing on an iPad. Excellent work. Second slamo

Dogg's comments.

Chilleywilley

THis author seems to have stayed around just long enough to really hone his style of having characters uncharacteristically (as in not otherwise a stuttering wimp or wife watcher like so many other authors like to write about) suddenly become passive for the sake of pushing his plot forward... and then change back once exposition has been dumped and the story inches forward.

In this story after the wife has become secretive and untrustworthy comes home late with freshly brushed teeth after being found out that she has plans to see known swappers after lying about some late meeting, the husband decides to do... nothing. In fact he decides to forget about it entirely... for no particular reason other than to ratchet tension and fury later.

Why did I pick that instance? Why not? There seems to be a few strewn through all of this author's stories. It get so tedious and tiresome...

yes you could stop being a wimp and letting her walk over you from the beginning and what i read from wifes actions and mails that's also why she essentialy left becouze he was weak

You spent 6 chapters relating what a wimp he is and what a slut she is! You took and excessively long time to build the story only to end it in a couple of paragraphs! The ending concerning any consequences to all of the parties involved was HORRIBLY lacking! Over all, the story was quite lame!

Isn't this one more piece of evidence, if any is needed, that a "Female-led Relationship" is no relationship at all.

It is telling that he at least had his experiences of being a "house husband" give him some insight into the demands made upon the woman as wife and mother, but she never clearly understood the reverse where her commitments to a career and work outside the home impose upon men.

AIN'T EQUALITY GRAND?

too often we get a mr perfect overly macho dick of a husband and a little miss perfect loving wife hit by the loving wives "slutray" not so in this story.

he was flawed and she was flawed right from the start, he was overly passive but grew as her betrayals and lack of respect increased. the other characters were sleazy enough without being ott and the consequences of her cruel plans were a nice measured response without private investigators, bugs, taps, trackers, or colt 45s.

brilliant scored every chapter 5*.

He hires a woman and then dates her? Talk about a mistake! He's a complete moron and only by a stroke of luck does he end up with custody of the kids. His IQ is that of a rock. Horrible ending.

When your spouse is willing to go that far to disrespect the marriage it's over for any reasonably self respecting person.

The revenge happens through plot devices and if it was not for the plot device called "phone call", the wimp would have allowed his children to be debased for the sake of his little plan. He was a wimp all the way and the story ends with him in a relationship with a young girl looking for safety in her first job and marriage. Lame, very lame.

While the plot was good, the weak, at best, emotional makeup of the husband detracted from the overall strength of the tale itself. It was a distraction as I kept finding myself asking “wth?” After some of the scenes.

She went nuclear on Him......He Wimped out in the end!......That's not Cricket!

However I am Giving you 5 Stars ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF. ...Story is Good

She cheated, but the good guy came out on top.

Albeit too slow in development.

Well recovered, I was wrong, and without a Deus est Machina!

Good try to twist things towards the end, but really the whole things was plain, sordid and stupid.

Writing is okay, though not outstanding.

Author should read other 'GOOD' writing to better understand character development.

And if, on the other hand, he was more intent on providing erotica, then the author failed even more abysmally.

the last few paragraphs. Did the stove timer go off or something? I got the impression they were written in less than 2 minutes. It really did ruin the story for me. From 5 to 3*'s

The last few paragraphs. Was your computer dying and you had to rush? It ruined the story for me and took it from a strong 5 *'s to a weak 3 *'s.

Those adults should be fucking shot

An interesting premise and fairly well written, but the story has all the subtlety of a flying brick. This author's approach seems to be - set the scene, jump in the car, floor the accelerator and speed down the road to the end, without pausing to consider that the odd twist and turn, change of direction, or breakdown in the middle of nowhere, might turn an okay story into something well worth the effort to read.

LA

In answer to the MC's final question, yes, you could have done more simply by not being such a weak bitch.

Good story until the end. The ending was rushed.

The MC was a wimp, pussy, looser, weak willed, pathetic and a useless twat. Why do people write about such abominations? -5*

That's a minus 5* BTW.

Why rush the end like this? Half a chapter more would not have been too much!

The real question should be "Should I have done more to prevent it? On this evidence the answer is very obviously "No".

"I did not want to see her face charges of neglect. She was still the mother of our children and had been a good one." Excuse me? In what universe does disconnecting from her children's lives in order to pursue a career equate to being a good mother? And that's before we even get to leaving them unattended so as to take part in depraved orgies. Why do MCs in these stories always have to be so damn noble? There is nothing vindictive about wanting to protect his children from the clutches of a depraved, degenerate pervert such as her and her partners in depravity. Like the author, I am a native of the UK and find it difficult to believe that any of our courts would let her anywhere near the children unless under supervision.

He did what he could when he could. LP

What a god damn mess of a story

a cuck tale... with a stupid stupid male MC.. who was led by his dick..! Fartguy tried to show it as some sort of BtB in a hastily put ending.. so 5 chapters of cuck shit and one of btb... overall verdict.. pathy crappy and full of cum soaked brains

What a fuvking douchebag this writer is...! Needs to change his name to fuckshit88!

I was glad to see the wife get her just deserts. I have to confess, though, that I was surprised to learn what a devious bitch she really was. I cannot say I would not have wanted her prosecuted. In fact, I am surprised that was even up to him.

1 star - there is nothing to like in this story.

The SLUT should have spent several years in a jail cell for endangering the lives of her children.

To my way of thinking, the husband should have bundled up his kids and took them home - especially, when he saw they were at risk - big failure on that point alone.

Pathetic BTB from a POS "ANOTHER" BRIT DEGENERATE CUCK WRITER!