All Comments on 'A Random Story'

You didn't mention that the writer was writing a story about himself and his wife!

5

The blonde process server is a loving wives icon!

poetic,

Too bad he was such a dope that when Melinda exposed her true self in college that he didn't learn the lesson about who she really was and stop wasting his time on a dead end relationship. Heck, "she only fell off the wagon three times" before they got married. Luckily they never had kids so she couldn't pass along her "slut" gene. Unfortunately, he seems stuck with his "poor sap" gene.

Laughed like hell when the wife faints the second time and all he does is drag her into the room so he can close the door. Yeah you don't treat women that way in real life, but in faiction? All's fair in love and wear! Good one Bob. Next time a little longer.

Obvious and predictable

So he did learn to write after all. Only she thought he couldn't! 4*!

So he dates a slut, then is surprised that she cheats on him when they get married.

It's hard to enjoy a story when the protagonist is a complete dumbass.

A rare one page 5 star from me. I thought that was where we were going by about 1/2 way through, but very well written.

Knew where you were going from the start and loved the fresh approach. 5*

Nice ending. Saw it coming though.

Only four stars because he deserved it. He knew she was a slut and married her anyway.

I wish authors stopped including the silly trope about "go after her boss for alienation of affections." Someone made the whole thing out of whole cloth because there is no such cause of action in any state, and yet authors keep plugging that trope into their stories.

Aardie nailed it. I dropped another star as he knew she was a round-heeled unfaithful slut in college. He deserves all the grief this divorce will bring upon him.

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What was all that crap about his dad forced him into college for a BA? He got his degree and never worked for his dad, went to a major airline and sh*t shift?!? So that part of the story was very disconnected.

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Missing is the outcome ending. Who got the house? Hard to believe it took 9yrs to discover her slut-ness, again. And no kids or STD's in 9yrs - lucky or prophetic?

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3.3***, hooyah

The Master creates another masterpiece. Thanks.

LMFAO!! Another good one JPB!!

another fine yarn from the JPB!

I was enjoying that a lot and then you got to the point where he grabs her leg and drags her out of the way. That was worth 5***** right there!

<chuckle>

Cracking little story - the structure, the plot, the surprises. Well done. And thank you

Cute twist. He never should have married her in the first place. His bad. D

Story in a story. Not sure I've seen that twist before on Lit. I enjoyed it.

Stupid people [in this case the plural is valid] deserve what they get. Two idiots thankfully did not have time to breed.

Enjoyed it as usual Bob, a 5. I see Harry is right as usual, his response was obvious and predictable!

somewhere east of Omaha

Story ruined by guy being such a complete idiot before they were married. Should have kicked the cheating skank slut out of his life then. Can't feel sorry for him if he's that stupid.

You never disappoint.

That’s it? Where’s FTDS when ya need him?

That’s it? Where’s FTDS when ya need him?

Unfinished

I could see where this was going, but written so well I had to go to the end.

On the surface, I'd have to say that I am in complete agreement with pretty much all of the previous commenters so far.

But, looking a little deeper, I see the possibility of another level to the story, one that doesn't seem to have occurred to most of those commenters (except possibly the very first one, who didn't elaborate).

Imagine for a moment, the following (keep in mind that most of this tale is related within a story that the MC has written):

Yes, he knew while still dating that his girlfriend/fiancee was a slut, and married her anyway.

Nowhere does the story tell us that he is surprised to find, after getting married, that his wife is still a slut. He only says, after finding she had fell off the wagon three times and pretending not to notice, to "Blame it on love". (Note that he states this only in the story he has written, which he knows his wife will be reading later.)

Then, he starts the divorce proceedings only after his wife begins being a slut for her boss, who "happens" to own the company. His attorney sees dollar signs.

][

Is it possible the MC had a "long range" plan in mind when he married? Might he have been setting things up all along for a possible "financial windfall" that could come once she eventually cheated, as he knew she would, if he just waited to divorce her at the right time?

As JPB wrote the story, this scenario certainly seems possible. If this was JPB's intention, it would turn his MC from the dumbass he appeared to be on the surface into a calculating man who made a plan that looked far ahead. Hmmmm!

Is JPB capable of writing that kind of subtlety into a story, or was this possibility a complete accident -- a la the old "typing monkeys" analogy? I suppose only JPB knows for sure!

I choose to believe it was no accident, making this story one of JPB's best! (5 stars)

When things were starting to get really interesting -- the story stopped.

FTDS please Mr. Just Plain Bob.

If he has to go to college and get a 4 years degree to work for his family's business... How did he end up working for an airline instead?

Inquiring minds want to know.

To KRD19254. How stupid can you be? If you’d just read a few more paragraphs you would have known what the story was really about!

A few minutes ago, I posted a comment about the subtlety JPB put into this story. Within the few minutes since, I realized there is another embedded subtlety that I had previously missed.

Via the literary writing "challenge" that was an important aspect of the story, JPB also managed to incorporate a gentle (and valid) criticism of his contemporaries on this site. But, he did it in such a way (using the writing of his story's MC) that they can't take realistically take offense without looking like idiots. I mean, who can they get pissed-off at, a fictional character?

Not only did his MC nail his writing challenge, but so did JPB, with THIS story! I'm impressed!

(Having read quite a few of his others, I'm somewhat tempted to ask who he stole it from .... but, having no other evidence, I won't!)

Good story! needed a little more to have a good end but I guess we know how it would end.

Great job, Bob!

Thank you JPB, for the pleasure of your well written but simple, story. Cheers.

It sure took him long enough to get rid of someone he knew was a slut.

someoneother

Check out this website: https://www.sodomalaw.com/faqs/alienation-of-affection/

P.o.s.

too predictable….. had it after the forewords..

Thanks JPB, I have missed you, very few writers of your caliber around anymore!

BA, FAce and Murdock as he lite his cigar.......I love it when a plan comes together

First short story of yours where I didn't feel like you needed to write more. It was to the point and funny. 5 stars.

fun read but why did you just quit? not your style at all

Great fun reading, however not your typical ending, therefore 4* s !

He knew what he was buying into when he married Melinda. Why is he surprised and why did it take him so many years to learn the details? 3*

Part 2??

Loved it. Good one!

Your stories are most likely caused the death of FTDS. most of your stories have no ending. It most likely passed him off enough to have a heart attack and killed him ya bastard

I hope he used her real name in the story. Nice, crisp and to the point.

I wasn't going to read this because you never finish a story. This is just another unfinished story that would have only take a few more paragraphs. 2 stars.

First, it makes no sense that he would use their real names but then change the background story. I get that you were probably trying to disguise the documentary nature of his story, but it would have been more realistic to introduce the characters prior to starting the interior story and using different names but the real background details.

I agree with others that he was an idiot to keep dating a known cheater, much less marry her. You would think he would at least be smart enough to have a prenup to protect him when it happened.

I do have to give you credit for bringing in an erotic story site without the cringe too many writers invoke with the way they do it.

Could you just once stop with the whores and cum queens? Maybe write about, sweet virginal girls staying true to their men. What, you can't find any?

3 stars - pretty much a standard BTB one page wonder from JPB.

JPB must have a standard template and just changes the names,

plus a few other details to make it seem different.

Pieces like this one, is what made you famous in this website. It was an excellent tale of betrayal and retribution with an unexpected ending. Thanks for the story.

so deserved what he got. Hope his 50% was worth it. Thanks for the effort.

??????????????

If you’re still so arrogant that you can’t understand the need to finish a story just quit. You’re really not more than a two bit author with a narcissistic streak a mile wide.

I saw a comment by someone else a while back, saying that the female characters here on Lit. sure do faint a lot. I have to agree that they do. That said, pretty good story once again by JPB. So thanks Bob, for the very entertaining story. 5 stars.

I sort of guess the story was about them.

He got himself into the mess. He knew what she was.

Cost him a lot more to get out of the mess he created

5/5

I'm not sure who is the bigger moron... Josh for marrying the cheating bitch or the writer for writing this crap. 1*

Geezzz dude. For once end a freaking story

Same thing over and over from this author. 856 times and counting.

A pretty good one, but he should not have been surprised by her slutty behavior.

great start. please continue.

More?

Meh. Why do your stories always have pussy male main characters who marry women they know are cheaters and then act surprised?

Bob needs a schtick. I think I've come across this story or a variation of it all from him several dozen times by now.

Needs a proper confrontation and aftermath.

Yes, there needs to be an ending to both stories.

Haha, saves the need to have to sit down and talk about it. It's pretty obvious that he already knows where all the bodies are hidden.

A case of the one=eyed monster being blind to a cheating liar. How stupid could he really be to marry such a slut"

If you've ever read any of my stuff you know exactly what I'm going to say.

The ending was perfect!

I’ve read a few of your stories and there’s a pattern to a lot. Guy meets girl, falls in love, she cheats he leaves her but gets back together only for her to get caught tears later. Damn talk about wasting one’s life, she’s already proved she’s a cheater why waste that time when there’s other women out there?

Your most obvious trope filled and poorly edited work to date. I usually enjoy your work but you phoned this one in. If you’re not going to put any effort into this than don’t waste your time or ours. You’re a better writer than this story indicates. Either do the work or retire.

I rarely comment on stories but this one I really liked

Personally, this story is not one of your best. The premise is fine, and his writing about his wife was classic. Leaving his wife unconscious on the floor and then watching tv to end the story was not a proper ending. Why did he not leave the bitch that night? His sitting in front of the telly implies, to me, that he will have a conversation with her when she comes to. There is no rational reason for him to be in that house anymore. Three stars.

Another chapter? Without it the ending sux

It's a nice ending and all, but let's be clear about this: I have absolutely zero sympathy for the MC.

He knew who she was, yet he still married her. Ignore the wise words of Mrs Angelou to your own risk. Silver lining: him marrying a slut will ultimately give him a huge benefit financially. Sure, it's not as great as bwing hooked to a faithful wife, but it's better than to just pay for a divorce.

Seriously, though: when they show you who they are, BELIEVE THEM the very first time. Pointless to waste souch time on pointless people.

Another JPB classic tale, with a great twist !

Definitely a 5 !

Not as good as your last story. A little longer story would have been better. Her crying, asking for him not to put her out.

Well. not your best, but I'm still laughing......

I used to like your work, but this was really disappointing.

So so. Two stars.

Meh. Good 50% story.

Good start - and then dropped in the black hole of nothingness!

You write so much better than this attempt.

We know that you know how to actually finish a story, so what happened to this one?

Wasted opportunity and very disappointed readers!!!!!!

He kinda deserved it🤷🏾‍♀️.. she showed him who she was when they were in college, and he refused to believe her.....he even made GREAT observations that showed she was not wife material.. hell, the slut wasn't even girlfriend material😂😂😂😂😂...he's the little wimp that couldn't just move on and find someone else.. of course she was fucking her dates in college fool🙄😂🙄😂😂🤭.. was he actually surprised to learn she's a round heel cum slut?😂😂🤔😂😂.. is he stupid?.. she was dating other guys in college‼️...he really should've been used to her bringing him a well used pussy on Sunday's😉.. she been doing it since college 🤭.. I think because he hadn't catch any STDS, he glossed over the fact that she never actually denied fucking her dates... men like this husband deserve everything they get🤧.. I have ZERO sympathy 🤷🏾‍♀️🤭.. did he think it was normal for his girlfriend to go on dates while he worked? It's not‼️.. he should've known if he married her, she'd want to go on dates while he's working.. he wanted to believe the utter horseshit she was saying because he's a weak pathetic loser.. hence why he glossed over some HUGE red flags.. Mell was not wife material.. she shouldn't even date or marry.. she should just stay single.. she enjoys variety, she enjoys going out drinking..WHY would he think this type of woman would make a good wife? The story was ok, but I would've liked to hear about the divorce.. it was just ok.. I was astonished that he actually continued the relationship after watching her swap spit with some guy in college.. for the life of me I couldn't understand him actually attaching himself to her legally. it's like he didn't want to believe what his mind/gut was telling him.. which was to just fuck her, don't marry her.. this is what desperation look like.. willing to put up with anything just to keep some toxic vile bitch in their life...dude need some self esteem and brain cells before he move on to his next relationship.. the minute she fixed her mouth to say she wasn't staying home while he worked.. he should've IMMEDIATELY ended that atrocious relationship..

Where is the rest?How can he host barbeques on a weekend when he is at work.

Usual JPB copypasta: dude marries cheater, gets surprised when she cheats then divorces her. Stupid is as stupid does.

Pleasant enough Femdom agitprop, but no story really,

Since you’re so specific in your statements about the law, you must know, that the fact that companies have a long-fraternization policy dies nNOT give a spouse (or any outsider for that matter) a legal claim against the company when it’s policy is violated. That is one of the tired false, non law-based topes that keeps recycling on this website and it’s flat out wrong as a matter of law. Those policies are forvthe COnPANY to enforce against an offending enployeee, not for an employee’s aggrieved spouse. Think about it for a second, why in the world would any company have an internal policy that subjected them to liability, needlessly? It’s stupid but th idiots on this website just lazily keep bring it up. Although it’s totally baseless. So, if the lawyers eyes were getting big forcthis claim, it’s because they’re bugging out if his head due to starvation from being a stupid lawyer bringing baseless claims with no payoff. Please stop with the ‘I sued the company forc all it was worth bullshit” It’s bullshit idiots. Find something teal to get your erections over.

I like the story 4-stars worth, writing a story for us mokes to read was a nice twist even if I was a tad suspicious early on.

I read the nitpicker's comments about laws and such and wonder why expect fiction to align with some real-world laws, rules, or regulations in some location.

...to see a fresh story from JPB.

Another well written short tome from the master. Great writing and skillful editing keep an otherwise weak story in the very enjoyable category. Thanks to JPB.

Keep 'em comin'!

The best stories have an element of truth in them. I have one of my own I have told several times. One guy contacted me and wanted to here more but he never followed thru.............if you marry a young (19) pretty lady with a kid you are asking for trouble, it only lasted 13 years..............

Begging to be finished.

Then again why would he marry her in the first place.

First jumping if point when she said she wanted to date during the week. Run. But ok your horny....

Second... When you find out dating want just hanging out but fucking... Or at least heat petting. Sprint away

This when she 'fell off the wagon'... Drive away in a fucking race car.

By that point... The universe has given you every indication of what's to come... Why wouldn't you listen?

At the end, he should have pushed her outside instead of pulling her back into the house!

ZK

There are quite a few JPB stories in which the guy deserves every bit of heartache he gets for marrying a cheating, dishonest girlfriend. I suppose they give a simple message, but in my view the message isn't profound enough to be used nearly as much as it is.

And then???

more please