All Comments on 'Coming Home Pt. 01'

Reads like a 12 year old wrote it

eagerly await the next firey bit

This isn't a bad story, but it reads as though it is a rough draft. It's like a skeleton of a story that needs fleshing out. If you took the same material, worked on the dialogue, the emotion, and the details, it would probably be about a third longer and be a much stronger story for it.

the anonymous commenting should be taken of this site. most generally it is just negative comments meant to discourage other writers. so ignore them.

please continue the story and see where it leads

I can't wait for chapter two. I hope it will be soon.

Keep it going

I agree with the other anonymous comment this story was rushed and it does feel like a rough draft I found it had potential but is currently kinda boring.

I enjoyed this a great deal. Ending on a cliffhanger was a nice touch and the sister taking charge worked well too. Nice job.

You have an interesting style house, a sexy sister jumping out of her skin to suck her brothers big cock, swallow his cum and then get drilled in her tight little cunt.

This is what sisters like and should be used like that. Maybe she might also want some backdoor, but please why have them get busted by the mommy. Just let’s them fuck in peace.

This story had potential it's well written but seemed too rushed to get to the sex. We have a sister that was in a failed lesbian relationship for sometime suddenly wanting to have sex with her brother who had just returned to live at home. No background story to explain why the sister suddenly wants to have sex with her brother or why her brother was so ready to have sex with her.

You followed a cookie-cutter routine: boy loses girlfriend, boy runs home to mama and sister, sister is horny and wants his cock - first in her mouth and then her pussy. Finally, and this was most obvious of all since he didn’t close and lock the door, mommy discovers them. Part two will see him fucking mommy and sister and knocking one or both up. Not a very good story at all.

Love the love and tender affection between brother and sister.

Will Mom join them or threaten.to kick them out.

Can't wait for the next chapter

Your story is very well written. He is fucked either way. Mom either kicks him to the curb or a threesome begins.

Same shit different author. Yawn! *

I know it's fiction but can you be a little more believable if you do another chapter.

The story has no real depth to it. It's so fast paced that it's plain to see that it was just a rush job.

Please finish this I'm curious to see what mom says.