All Comments on 'Fallen Angel - Innocent Angel Pt. 04'

More clinical the than I like but understandable for these two characters. The story read like a Betty Crocker recipe at times (first I am going to do this, then you will do this, then I will do that and you...). Their dialogue was a bit repetitive too. You used the word “feel” or it’s derivatives 42 times on the second page alone. Never had to wonder about what someone was feeling...we kept getting told unnecessarily so multiple times in nearly every paragraph.

Still a fun story and a solid ending. 3 stars. Please keep writing.