HOA

"Unlike me, this nice man is nearly 90 years old. He can barely walk and his wife is unable to even get out of bed. At some point, there has to be a mechanism to take into account the human aspects of each case. Yes, again, I understand that once the HOA makes one exception, people will demand them even when they are in violation of a rule but fully able to comply. Still, this just seems grossly unfair to me."

After a final read, she sat there debating on whether or not to send it for several minutes. And then, without further thought, she hit 'enter' on her computer, and seconds later her post appeared.

"Oh, boy. I wonder if I'll get blasted," she thought, immediately regretting having sent it.

And then she thought, "No, it's not a matter of 'if', it's only a matter of how badly I'll get blasted and how many people will be doing the blasting."

Surprisingly, she was able to let go of the thought, and fell asleep around 10:30 and didn't wake up until 6:15am, her normal rise-and-shine time.

After starting the coffee pot, she went outside and dumped out some corn, then went back in and waited. But as soon as the coffee was brewed, she took her cup and went to the computer instead of to her recliner.

"Here we go," she said as she opened the the shortcut to the site.

She had 15 public replies just in the hours since she'd posted it, but there were also two private replies, something she hadn't realized was even possible until just then.

She started with the public responses, and to her very pleasant surprise, only one comment was negative, and she recognized the name of the person who accused her of 'whining'. He'd done the same thing to pretty much every person who'd posted anything negative about the HOA, so she was able to dismiss him as a whiner himself—or possibly a member of the HOA. Or both.

Everyone else was either supportive or very supportive, especially when it came to her elderly neighbors. Just like last night, she saw that a very large majority of the comments were from women, and that, too, made sense to her.

From there, she went to the private comments and saw that both of them were from men.

"Ha!" she said out loud when the guy she nicknamed Mr. Whiner was one of them.

"Gee. What a surprise," she told herself as she read his caustic comment. He posted anonymously and had no avatar of any kind, thus reinforcing Valerie's growing negative opinion of him.

The other was from someone named Ken Cushman, who lived two blocks up from her and about halfway down that particular street. Like all the others, Valerie had never seen him before, either, but there was at least a photo of him, and although it was a little blurry, he appeared to be a rather attractive, younger man.

Not sure what to expect, she opened his private comment with one eye barely open as though that would somehow make any bad news better.

"Hi, Valerie. As you can see, my name is Ken, and I rarely ever comment, but what you wrote was so different from nearly all the posts I've read on this site I felt compelled to send you a private note. I'm all for people being able to say anything they like, but I really get tired of the constant drumbeat of complaints without any acknowledgement of any responsibility. It was very refreshing to see someone express their displeasure while admitting they're at fault.

Don't get me wrong. The HOA drives me crazy. It hammers residents all the time for things like 'bad grass' (sorry, but that sounds a lot like someone claiming the marijuana they bought was substandard) but they don't keep up the common areas per the C&Rs. Or would that be Cs&Rs or maybe even C's&R's?

So I feel your pain. I haven't been hit by them yet, but it's probably just a matter of time, right?

Oh, if you need any help taking down that backboard, please let me know. I won't bother you again if you have it covered, but thought I'd offer since I'm 'here'.

Take care, and thanks again for the thoughtful commentary. Ken."

"How...thoughtful," she said quietly as she considered what to say in response.

And then she glanced at the computer's clock and sighed.

"I guess I won't be replying at all. At least not until I get home this evening."

After another crazy day at work followed by dinner and spending some time with Jayden, Valerie finally got back to the computer a little after 8pm. She'd been swamped all day, which was a good thing, and didn't have time to think about the HOA website which wasn't the HOA's but the neighborhood's. In fact, it was aptly called 'Neighborhood Watch'.

She quickly checked the three additional public comments made to her post, then went to reread Ken's and saw another red '1'. She opened it, and saw that it, too, was from Ken.

"I debated saying this, but as you can see, I've 'done gone and said it', so I hope you won't consider me some kind of...weirdo. I just wanted to say the photo of you is very...flattering. Okay. I'm really done this time. No...really. Ken."

He put in a bunch of smiley faces, and Valerie couldn't help smiling when she read it. She then took a closer look at his photo, and gee, what a big surprise. It was still blurry. But just as she remembered, it was clear enough to tell he was a very decent-looking guy. She couldn't be sure of his age, but she was guessing early 30s causing her to wonder why she even cared as she was too busy to date, and once she had more time, a guy who was 30 wouldn't be the kind of man she'd be looking for anyway.

And yet, even as she thought that, she wondered if it might be an older photo which would mean he could possibly be closer to her age. That, too, made her laugh as she realized once again, it just didn't matter. But it was very nice of him to say something so kind, just the same.

She spent a few moments deciding what to say then began typing.

"Dear Ken. Thank you for the comment and for the very unexpected (but pleasant) compliment. That pic was taken a year ago so it isn't current, but it seemed good enough for this site.

As to my complaints, yes, I agree the HOA is very inconsistent. I've noticed the same thing when I drive in. The common area is the first impression people get about our development, and when the grass looks that bad, it makes me wonder what they do with all the money we're required to send them each year.

And while I'm on the topic of money, why is it they raise our dues by 10% each year? I know the Covenants and Restrictions (I've avoiding the abbreviation altogether) allow that, but why the full 10%? What is the specific justification? Why not 7% or 3%? I would think the HOA board would project its expenses then assess us accordingly. When they assess the maximum year after year, it leads me to believe they're not doing that and just want as much cash on hand as possible. Of course, I could be missing an important factor, but it strikes me as excessive and unnecessary.

My ex-husband put the backboard up for our son, Jayden a couple of months ago. I have a rule about never saying anything negative about him in front of our son, but the truth is he's so unreliable I can't count on him getting over here within the time remaining to remove it, and I can't possibly get it down by myself. I very much appreciate your kind offer to help, but I can't ask someone I don't even know to do that. Still, it was very kind of you to offer. One way or the other, I'll get it taken care of.

Lastly, I'm saddened (and this is my fault, too) by how few people I know in this entire development. I've been here five years now and the only people I really know are my next-door neighbors, and I don't really even know them well at all. They're the elderly couple I referred to who are being forced to resod their lawn. My sense is they're living on a fixed income and can't afford to do that. I work full-time, and when I had my yard resodded, that expense, along with a couple of others that happened around the same time, set me back for two years. The good news is I'll be paid up this month, but still, I can't help but feel bad for them.

Anyway, it's been a pleasure chatting with you, and thanks again for you support, your kind offer, and the compliment. Valerie."

She'd been so focused on what she was doing, Valerie hadn't seen Jayden walk up behind her, so when she turned around, he startled her.

"Sorry, Mom. I didn't mean to scare you. I just wanted to know if you'll play video games with me for a while before I have to go to bed."

It was 8:25 so she asked if he'd taken a shower yet.

"No," he glumly told her.

"Go do that, and I'll play with you."

When his expression didn't change, she said, "Okay, you can stay up and extra 15 minutes tonight. How's that?"

She reached out and grabbed his side knowing he was extremely ticklish.

"Okay, okay! That's fine," he told her as he headed for the bathroom.

As she watched him walk away, she knew it wouldn't be long before something so simple wouldn't be enough to distract him. But for now, all she could do was try whatever worked, and hope she'd have the wisdom to figure out how to deal with a teenage boy when the time came.

And that caused her to sigh out loud as she wished with all her heart her son had a caring, dedicated man in his life who'd willingly be there for him every single day no matter what. And that thought further caused her wonder if there would ever be that kind of man in her life who would also love her the way she'd always hoped to be love.

Her ex had been so charming when they met back when she was in veterinarian school. But even then the alarm bells were going off about his very laid-back attitude on pretty much everything.

About a year after they were married, even lovemaking became a 'chore' for him. He'd never been overly passionate, but he was handsome and at least adequate in bed. But shortly after their first anniversary, he started making excuses about being too tired or not feeling well even though he averaged about 20 hours a work painting houses while averaging at least 4-5 beers a night.

Looking back, it was a wonder she'd even gotten pregnant. But by then she was so focused on work and building her practice, she dismissed her husband's lack of interest as being no big deal. And yet, Valerie had always enjoyed lovemaking, and she felt cheated out of some of the best years of her life. So when he finally announced he was moving out, she was almost relieved on some level.

But there was another level on which she was extremely unhappy. Work was a great distraction, and she had her son, too. But at 43, she was truly in her sexual prime yet she was living a completely asexual life.

As Jayden showered, she laughed to herself when she thought about the number of AAA batteries she'd gone through for the tiny vibrator she'd nearly worn out since her husband walked away. And although she knew exactly when the last time had been when she'd had the real thing, it seemed so long ago it may as well have been someone else she was thinking of.

She actually laughed out loud when she went back and looked at Ken's pic again as she thought, "I wonder if Ken is single?"

The photo was still blurry, and Jayden was already out of the shower, and calling for her to come and play.

"Be right there, buddy!" she called back as she wistfully looked at his photo before walking away from the computer.

It was close to 9:30 when Valerie sat back down. Jayden was in bed, the coffee pot was ready, and she had everything laid out for work when she noticed Ken had replied to her again.

"Hi, Valerie. Yes, it's me—again. I just wanted to let you know it's no problem at all for me to swing by and take the backboard down for you. I don't have a family (other than a 12-year old Lab with a ton of health problems), so you wouldn't be inconveniencing me at all. I'm a contractor, and I've got pretty much every tool ever made. So if you could maybe just help me keep it from falling, I can take care of it for you in a few minutes.

It really isn't a problem, so just give me a holler if you'd like my help. Okay, this time I really am done! Ken."

As she sat there reading then rereading Ken's latest reply, several things hit her. She'd wrongly assumed he was married just because he lived in a single family home in the same development. And while she had no way of knowing what he did for a living, she'd guessed he was teacher, so learning he was a contractor was another big surprise. Lastly, if he had a dog that needed her help, she wouldn't feel as bad about asking for his. In fact, she could offer a free visit in return for his time and effort.

Armed with this new information, she tapped out a reply to him:

"Hi, Ken—again. (Sorry, I'm no better at humor than you are!)

As it so happens, I'm a veterinarian, and if you'd like, I'm happy to see your dog for no charge in exchange for your help with my latest HOA concern. I don't know why it's so hard for me to let someone do a favor for me, but we all have our quirks. If that sounds okay to you, please let me know and we can work out a time to take care of your Lab and my backboard.

I hate to harp on it, but because my son enjoys playing so much, it really eats me up to have to take it down. But...'thems the rules, right'? Valerie.

Five minutes later she had her answer.

"My dog's name is Hank, and the sooner the better. He's still eating and drinking, but I'm getting worried about him. As I said, he's 12, and I know Labs don't live all that long, but unless he's in pain, every day is a big deal to me, so anything you could do would be wonderful.

I can take off for a couple of hours any day, so I can call your office number tomorrow and set up a time. Then when we talk, we can figure out when to take that 'horrible, unsightly' monster hanging off of your house!

PS. I can't tell you how much I appreciate this. The last vet I took him to basically told me any further treatment was a waste of time and money. He may be right, but I didn't think it was very professional to put it that way.

PSS. I'm looking forward to meeting you! Ken—who clearly isn't done."

Valerie laughed quietly when she read his reply.

She wrote back:

"A sense of humor. Nice! Yes, please call the office tomorrow. I'll let them know to expect your call, and we'll get you and Hank in ASAP."

She provided the phone number and the name of her clinic then said:

"I'm looking forward to meeting you, too, Ken. Valerie."

Early the next morning Valerie let the two girls who worked up front at the clinic know to expect a call from someone named Ken.

"Please work him in at his convenience, okay?"

He called a little after ten, and asked for the last appointment of the day which was at 5:45.

When Ken showed up with Duke at 5:35, one of the girls saw them coming in and said, "Ah! Look at that poor dog!"

The other said, "Look at that dog's...owner!"

The first girl, who's name was Rachel, got up and went to help as Ken started laying down a mat of some kind while he held the door open with one leg.

"He can't walk on tile anymore," Ken explained.

He had two mats, so Rachel took the other and laid it in front of the first. Doing that two more times let them get up to the counter without any problem.

"Good boy!" she said to Hank as he stood there wagging his tail.

The top left half of his head had collapsed, and there was a huge lipoma hanging from the middle of his stomach the size of very large potato. Lipomas were just unsightly fat deposits that could be huge, but unless they interfered with an animal's ability to walk or swallow, it was safer to leave them in place than perform surgery with its attendant risk of infection. He also had a three-inch skin tag hanging down in front of the lipoma as well as several other smaller ones on his face and legs.

Rachel checked him in while the second girl, who's name was Amanda, continued to check him out. He wasn't wearing a wedding ring, and that made him fair game in her book.

"I haven't seen you in here before, Ken," Amanda said with a big smile. "I'd have remembered. Trust me."

Rachel shook her head as Ken politely answered her.

"No, this is my first time," he said smiling back.

"Hmmm. I have a very hard time believing this is your...first time," Amanda said shamelessly.

Ken chuckled politely while Rachel got him checked in.

"Just have a seat and the tech will be out shortly and then Dr. Eimann will see you."

Ken laid out the first mat causing Rachel to get back up and help out again. They 'blazed a trail' into the waiting room, where Hank gladly laid down on one of the mats as they waited to be seen.

He was still only about 10 feet from the check-in counter and he overheard Amanda saying, "He is so hot!"

He looked up and saw Rachel glance his way and use her eyes as if to say, "I am so sorry!"

Ken only smiled then went back to petting his best friend.

Less than five minutes later, another young woman came into the waiting area and asked for Hank Cushman.

"That's us, boy," Ken said as he helped his faithful companion stand up.

Rachel came back out and picked up the unused mat each time and, as before, laid it down for the ailing dog.

"Thank you very much," Ken told her.

"You're very welcome," she said with a sweet smile.

The tech, whose name was Emma, asked a series of questions while Ken filled out some paperwork which he handed to her when he was finished.

"Dr. Eimann will be right in, sir," she told him pleasantly.

Just seconds later there was a tap on the door before it opened.

"Ken? Hi! I'm Doc...sorry. I'm Valerie," she said with a very happy smile and her hand extended.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, and thanks for agreeing to see us," he said as he shook her tiny hand.

"Same here, and thank you in advance for agreeing to help me out."

For some reason, Ken was totally surprised by how small she was. All he could see in her photo was her face, and he already knew she was pretty. But she was a very petite woman, and that really caught him off guard.

"I don't know if this will work for you, but I could follow you straight home and knock it out before dinner," he said as his brain quickly 'sized her up'.

"Um...sure. I have some paperwork to do after I finish with Hank, but I'll gladly put that off until tomorrow morning. The only thing I really have to do is get my son from aftercare at school."

"That sounds perfect," Ken told her.

"Okay, let's take a look at this handsome guy, shall we?" she said very cheerfully.

She, too, was shocked by his appearance. The blurry photo indicated a nice-looking buy, but Ken was downright handsome to the point of being unnerving.

Valerie did her best to put all that out of her mind as she began with the collapsed nerve on his head and said, "Have you had the trigeminal nerve biopsied by any chance? They can be benign, but this is often a type of tumor that attacks the nerve sheath."

"No. The last vet we went to said the rate of reoccurrence is over 70%, so I opted not to."

"Unfortunately, that's true. You could spend a lot of money just on the diagnosis then there's the surgery and chemotherapy. And as you said, in 7 out of 10 cases, the cancer comes back. And since he's 12, I think you made the right call."

She checked him from head to toe then had him stand up and walk.

"Do you give him any kind of chondroitin supplements for the arthritis?"

"I do. He gets it twice a day."

"Good. I think he'd benefit from pain medication, too. We have quite a few options now that don't damage the kidneys so I'll write you a prescription and that should help make getting up and walking a little easier."

"Thank you," Ken told her sincerely. "I know it's only a matter of time, but I'm hoping it'll be as long as possible."

"You just never know. He could make it a couple more years or...a couple of months. It's just too hard to say. But as long as he's eating, drinking, sleeping, and walking without too much pain, I see no need to even think about the uh...the inevitable."