All Comments on 'Ivan Horton's Choice Ch. 02'

Great Story!

Boyd

good story. great beginning and middle, with lots of conversation and action, weaker ending.

common problem. the historians ending you might say.

It had a few different slants on a perennial theme.

As the comment below said, the story was great, but the ending was definitely a let down.

It seems to me no matter the genre on Lit, no matter how hard authors work on the plot and characters, they so often run out of puff with the ending. Or do they get to a certain point and lose interest in their own idea and decide to finish it in a few lines?

The ending is an extremely important part of a story, if not the most important. Usually it is the lasting impression we readers have of the story.

Endings aren't easy - they are likely the hardest part of a story. Unfortunately most authors spend little time getting them right.

Just a fantastic story that engrosses and makes a satisfied smile come to one’s face. The ending to me was fine as people want every small detail answered it seems in this format. Sometimes the mind lets us imagine how nice it all turned out without being told.

With the highest of respect and thank you for the entertainment

PT

interesting twist to the ending. rebecca and Ivan could never get topgether in the original.

After reading peggytwitty's comment, which completely misinterpreted my comment, and a question form the author, I decided to make this comment.

Bear in mind I like the story and I believe my criticism is constructive.

I did NOT say I didn't like the ending, I didn't say it was not in keeping with the rest of the story, nor did I say it was incomplete.

I have no interest in this story except as a reader. I do not read a story as an editor unless that is why I am reading it. I read stories on Lit for enjoyment, but sometimes things leap out at me as I read - incorrectlry spelled words and bad grammar for example. This story was good in that regard.

I also expect a story to flow from start to end, and have, for want of a better term at the moment, a basic rhythm.

I made my first comment without fully investigating my discomfort with the ending, just that it was a very strong feeling I had when I finished the story. I have now looked again.

The part of my comment which applied directly to this story is:

"no matter the genre on Lit, no matter how hard authors work on the plot and characters, they so often run out of puff with the ending."

This story was well paced - a bit of necessary background, and then it flowed basically 'real time' with no long gaps either actual or inferred between the various epidodes related to us.

It kept that even pace right up to the part where the 'bad' professor was fired.

Then suddenly we get thru 35 years in a dozen lines.

It was supremely insufficient space to do any justice to the timespan, it spoiled the wonderful rhythm of the rest of the story, and, worst of all, it was completely unnecessary - we all could have inferred success for this couple without the trite final paragraphs.

Of five comments, three mentioned the ending - must have some significance, surely?

If all I achieve is that one or a few authors think twice about their endings, I have succeeded. It's a selfish thing really - I want to enjoy the stories I read.

Writing is a mixture of lots of things, some important in their own right, some less important, but when all facets are done well the story is remarkably better.

Authors who want to improve as writers always seem to willingly accept constructive ideas and file them away ready to consider next time they write.

I suggest that any writer recall stories they read and really liked, and go back to read them again closely and see what the author did to make the story so good.

but the bit about Horvath, Russia and Hungary has gone completely over my head.

Is it a Jewish name? - Seems Binky inferred that was not the case.

So, can someone tell me what the problem with the name or lineage was?

I know there was a problem, accepted it for the story, but have no idea what was going on there.

Otherwise I liked the story, but agree with K40 about the epilogue.

Are we really so dumb as readers we could not surmise they stayed together, happlily ever after? You DID label it 'romance'. What other ending is allowable for a true 'romance' story?

The flow of the story is without peer, and beautiful. I love characters who grow before my eyes, who not only see themselves clearly, but show as a sign of strength their willingness and even need to learn from their mishaps and poor decisions, without self-recrimination.

I loved, absolutely adored, the scene in the apartment during which Rebecca and Ivan showed their passion for each other, lovingly and unselfishly. It was hot, sensual and beautifully written.

Thank you for sharing your great ability with words with me.

I liked it very much.