All Comments on 'Senior Year at Sommerville High Ch. 01'

Very nice job on your first attempt. Can't wait for part #2. Cheers! Frankie

Good for a first attempt. Some grammar errors here and there but overall pretty damn good.

it off to a good start.

I agree with the others so far. A few errors, a few spots where the flow could have been more smooth, but I am anxiously awaiting the next part.

It’s a good start for your first story. A lot of it there is no build up and no character development and why the characters do what they do. You can’t have a character just kiss another one without building it up as to why and what made they do it.

You go from a third-person perspective to a first-person perspective midway through the first page.

Congratulations on the start of your writing journey

This was a fun start to the series, if there's something that I believe would improve the reader experience it would be for some sort of Character Guide at the start of each entry.

Example: TYLER - Jake's best friend, Soniya's boyfriend

Looking forward to reading more!

Innumerable errors. I SINCERELY stopped reading at "...cock mouth..." on the middle page.