All Comments on 'Sister-in-Law Helps Out'

And I love the length of your submissions.

Thank You

I usually don't like, in fact hate stories this long, but this one kept me spellbound.

I couldn't wait to read what happened next. This story was erotic from the start to the finish, and I have to admit I enjoyed every page of it...

Definitely awesome!!!!!

Story is fine. But why do you use the present tense? It's awkward. Occasionally there's a reason for it, but here? You should imagine you're relating this story to a 3rd party. Actually, you are. Us. That means you should use the past tense unless you are very good and know exactly what you are doing.

Changes of tense, changes of name, cliche-ridden (rock-hard cocks and velvet gloves, for fuck's sake). And rather poorly written. Too much telling, not enough showing.

You have the makings of writer but you've a long way to go. A decent editor would have chopped half the unneccessary verbiage and long-winded explanations. You'd have a good story then. Less is better: an adage applicable to all writers, on Lit or anywhere else.

And yes, I'm a writer. But I have discovered the hard way that if I put my name to any critique of a story, my tales get bombed. So I only sign when I've nothing but good to say.

Um. And I NEVER remove negative comments on my stories.

I liked the premise of the story even though to some degree it's been partially told in other stories. The length was just right and I had no problem with "2nd party" or "3rd party" views. Based on how much terrible stuff is present on this site...it's easy to give it a 5.

For the person who signed Anonymous, and claims to be a writer....better check your own verbage and grammar before you talk about someone elses writing. Since when do we start a sentence with the word AND?

Think this is just another case of writer envy... this was a very good story, don't cheapen it.

Pretty good story but just too darn long for those of us with a short attention span.

Erotic and hot, with a lot of taboo sex. I enjoyed the storyline and the author kept the story alive in my mind.

Thanks for the good read

It was a little longer than what I am use to here, but I liked it.

And why is it always "Anonymous" that rarely has anything good to say. If you can't use your log-in name, then don't say anything.

And it was not too long. Just right in fact.

When will the brothers in law suck each other off?

Very well told story, yea a couple of little things that an editor could have helped with, but nothing to get in a twist over. It was well told, erotic and had me standing tall till the end. You tell a good story.

Some of us on here actually appreciate a good read from time to time with good content..this story had both. One slip from Sharon to Sandy slip you up?.... really? Well then I guess we can tell what kind of stories float your boat, those that require very little imagination and an extremely short attention span. Try a little more reading and a little less frantic spanking maybe it'll even increase your intensity when that special time comes for you not to mention broaden your imagination.

I have you as one of my favorites and have missed your stories. Welcome back! Will we be hearing more about this foursome?

Loved the entire package, once I understood you wanted to do character development as well as well-described sex scenes. Anonymous can go back to the library....try Sesame Street, perhaps? This story, however, was well written, intended for adults and created an atmosphere of sharing and love, not envy nor dislike (read that, did you Anonymous?).

Hopefully (???) you'll submit a sequel? All the characters are likeable (sp? hahaha) and I have really enjoyed the time spent reading this one.

I really loved your story, the fact that both sets of husbands, and wives had sexual partners, that had sexually repressed feelings, made it all the more exciting too read. Thank you for such a tender and loving story.

Very nice story, had length and was a great read. There about 3 or 4 writers that I follow on this site, and your name is up there :) Keep the stories coming, please!

I was sitting on pins and needles 'til the second last page, wondering how you were going to resolve this.

I actually had to put it down because my wife had supper ready and I spent the whole mealtime thinking about it.

I would gladly read any sequels.

I could see the sisters in law giving each other pleasure in the next session, and the sight of it giving the brothers in law the stimulation to do the same for each other while watching the ladies

SUPER great read, please keep these two couples going! Time for Sharon to get her dream of a cock in her ass and pussy at the same time. Then let Rhonda get the same and the two girls can put on a show for the guys. Hell.....even take it to the highest level of all....Tim and Paul sucjing and fucking each other while the girls watch and then play too!

love the story and how it all worked together in the end with all of them fucking each other .

This is one of the BEST stories I have ever read in many years !!! Thank you - please keep writing about Tim & Sharon and Rhonda and Paul; with multiple pages like you just did.

I think when they get home, the girls should experiment and I think the guys should come up with a few new things too; like maybe oral contests or even both guys cumming on Sharon's big boobs and then do it to Rhonda, etc.

I anxiously await the next chapters. Its so HOT - thanks again.

Thanks, This story is GREAT!!!

I've read dozens of these stories & this is BY FAR the best yet! THANK YOU!!

What a great fucking stories U need to cont. and get m om and dad invovled

Fabulous, brilliant story from start to finish.

FANTASTIC!

I'm usually turned off by the longer stories. Yours kept me cumming back for more. Very well thought out and executed story. Can't wait to read more!

Well Done , Thanks

from Peter Rude

good job well done thanks

Have read a lot of stories but this was the BEST

I usually read erotica with the intention of getting hot and ready for my hubby (who is great at doing it himself but works long hours and rarely has the energy) but not doing anything until he get home and takes care of me. I found waiting for him completely impossible. He found walking in on me mid-fourth-orgasm incredible. THANKS!

Not bad, but all the religious nonsense was unnecessary. Paul and his sister, Sharon, could have simply fucked when they were in college and have never been able to forget their one night together. This led to their inability to have a real sexual relationship with their spouses causing Time and Rhonda to turn to each other and have an affair. Finally, Paul and Sharon can't stand the sexual tension and have to fuck again. Ultimately, both relationships come out in the open. You could have ended it with a massive orgy. All the penance and sinning and theology quotes made the story WAY too long. Otherwise a good effort.

I have never left a comment before, but after reading that I just had to write and congratulate you on a superb story. Simply the best I have read. Well done!

Simply the best better than all the rest to quote a famous song!!

What a great read! I have never read first time anal sex (Rhonda + Tim) so well described. Cudos.

I love that Tim was thoughtful enough to do some research and it was great that Sharon wanted to please him so much that she did research too.

I usually prefer father/daughter incest stories but your story was so well written I couldn't stop reading it.

I'm also a writer, not erotica, and I thought you did a great job.

cheri8

i've been visitin dis site 4 quit some time now and hav read so many stories bt have neva comented on any bt dis one is a very great story.

I've never left a comment before, but this was too good to ignore, it was simply amazinggggggggg

talk about dreams cumming true all the greats are covered here. Thank you, incest, group sex and the swapping thing. can only say WOW what a great read and thanks it was all here and did not have to wait for each chapter.

mind blowing !! just pure awesomeness !!

The author is pure genius. Superb narration.

I really enjoyed that fro a couple of reason. Plausibility, interesting characters and a very good plot being not the least of them.

And then there was the high level of... well... sex in this without ever dropping the story itself short.

What's not to enjoy...? ;-D

Thank you very much!

What a story. Being long it was great. Best one I have read!

I've read hundreds of books. I've got a small library (4 shelves) of different types of books. This story SHOULD BE A BOOK!!!!!

I love the way it was written. So well thought out and worded. I had EVERYTHING a book should have. Great characters with their backgrounds, an awesome history after the plot was written. Everything just flowed perfectly!!!!

I don't comment much about stories I've read here because of the way they're written (bad plot, story, HORRENDOUS grammar at times, but GOLLYGEEWHIZ!!!!!

This is the BEST story I've read since I found this website 6 yrs ago, and I've read hundreds of these stories!!!!!

i wish my hubby and my boyfriend and his wife would agree to this life would be sooooo much happier and simpler right now me and my bf are fucking without the knowledge of our spouses though they about us but they think we have stopped meeting as they had a BIG prob with it!

Long but deliciously long.

I started reading this and could not stop....my pussy was so wet the whole time...I got dressed up...and fucked at a bar after reading this

Naughtyme said it all. Proper job.

This story will be the measuring stick to all erotic stories I read. I enjoyed other stories you wrote but this was a sexy, strange, erotic tale that I could not stop reading. My cock wanted me to touch it, but I could not stop reading.

What a great story! Thank you for your imagination and the effort it took to give us this story to read and enjoy. I can only hope your muse does not abandon you and we can someday read more of the same, fine quality work. I'm disappointed by so many criticisms of the length. I was sorry to finish it. Thanks again.

Woodlands1946

The best wank I had in a long time when reading this story!!

one of the best stories ever written and trust i have been through a lot...in terms of imagination, in term of story unviels...simply fantastic...should write more often...

Wonderful story; masterful writing!!DDC

6 stars to u, best story ever

I think this is one of the best I have read. Hope you can write more of this kind of story.

Just add some humor about sniffing dirty panties and laughing about it. Sitting casually naked with pussies gaping open.

That was fantastic

Just re-read! Exceptional plot and great research - even Deuteronomy comes in! Will be reading more. Please keep writing

Loved the build up in the story. Kept me wet and playing with my pussy. Would love to see more stories similar to this with variations of course.

I must say that I was surprised quite a few times in this story. There were the usual unbelievable story lines as well as quite a few elements that made it very believable. Very good!

nice story

two things though :

-sometimes the point of view "know it all" makes it slightly less interesting

-I think this story lacked some kind of heated argument or something like a problem to be solved. every character seemed to have issues but they solve them rather quickly. Paul could have stormed out for example & went away for a whole day & night or get angry and hit someone and yell and all ...

just saying though you know ^^, it's still a good story that I enjoyed ^^

Are you kidding me? This is one of the best? Learn to write, learn the meaning of present, past and future tense, and try again. I literally couldn't bear to finish trying to read this, skipped to the last page - and yep, no surprises there.

So, he married a woman who thought that sex was "...dirty and disgusting, something only done as a monthly obligation." Why did he marry her? For her money? Didn't he even play with her tits, suck her mipples, or _something_ before they took the vows? This story is psychologically implausible from the get-go.

Rachel in Eugene

Can not get enough. You are one of the best writers I have read. Keep up the good work.

Yep, there were a few grammar and other mechanical mistakes, but I liked the plot and characters. The present tense style was a kittle off-putting, too; but I' not going to hold that against the author. It's hard for most published pros to make that work.

Two items dealing with previous comments: Don't be so quick to disbelieve that a person would marry someone who turned out to resist sexual experimentation. I know from personal experience that if someone you truly love says "not until marriage", there are people who will wait, hoping that you can learn to please each other after the vows. And talking about sexual hang-ups and problems before you're married, but after you've decided you love the other person, is like navigating a mine field. (It's working out nicely now, thank you.)

The other thing is the suggestion that the relationships develop into homosexual pairings. Look, I know that's popular enough for its own category, but despite that, most men I know or have talked to over the years are seriously weirded out by the thought of that happening, whatever voyeuristic pleasure they might get out of watching another couple MF or FF go at it.

Is it fair for them to deny others the same voyeuristic pleasure? Maybe on some totally sociological level. But the esthetics just don't work for a hell of a lot of us. And we do, in fact get a choice about our sex partners, particularly in fantasy stories we write. As long as a guy is not pushing you to swing or try it with another woman, you might just have to accept it, and don't expect to find it cropping up in a lot of stories written by straight men.

You can call it homophobia if you want, but we're not really interested in even trying it.

that was great..... two of the best stories in one... really enjoyed it... just cant get over the English teachers on this site though.... thanks and keep writing....

You're able to keep the pace of the story going for the whole 12 pages keeping it interesting and enjoyable.

Very well done.

Very good story. Ditto on the horny English teachers!!

This was one of the best story's i've ever heard thank u hope to here more soon

Would have been nice to see some lesbian action or even some hot French kissing between the girls while they were having the foursome. But this was still Awesome :)

Great story! I was looking forward to Sharon being taken by Tim in the ass and by Paul in the pussy at the beach house but sadly, it didn't happen. Maybe when Rhonda is out of town then... Thanks for sharing.

PS. Don't let the negative comments get you down.

loved the story so hot

The story was running at a good five stars until the last chapter........ then it morphed into a solid ten stars.......

Nuff said.....

I love long hot stories like this. I agree with other commenters that having the two women make out would have been awesome!

It takes a LOT of love for this level of sharing. In real life, we're talking about four different people...hard enough for two people to commit to living out such a fantasy much less all four. Repression is such a hard wall to break down. You handled it nicely but I'm not sold that Paul is in it for the long haul.

So turned on. Believed every word.

Mine was two sisters and their respective husbands. The man of the first couple

breaks his sister-in-law's cherry. Later, her own husband (now married to each other), finds what he already suspected. However, they didn't go as far. The first husband enjoyed both women, but all the other got was ............... Well, he never got any.

I don't usually like the head-hoping (omniscient) narration in a story but in this one it works brilliantly. The reader feels for the characters and the HEA (happy ever after) with a wonderful twist works. We all need to be happy and filled with love. Great story. This is what good erotica should be all about.

It's a good thing this is a fansty cause the way this turned out it won't take it long at all before both marriages are over I know if it was me I would not be OK with it I don't know many men that would be OK with it

Yes it is a work of fiction but as a reader I was able to relate to the characters and that is what a good author strives for.

For all would be writers, you will note that there were no 14" cocks or 42DD breasts and yet it was still very erotic.

Fact check:

God, in the New Testament, commands us to not deny marital sex except for agreed upon times of prayer and wife having menstrual period. Woman not to deny husband, nor husband to deny woman.

Also: says lust is a reason for marriage.

Seems the Creator knows His creationns, after all. -:)

Liked the idea of them overcoming their inhibitions and it was done in a unique way. Also found it amusing when the siblings called each other out for not following the penance. Almost as if enjoying sex with their mate made them unfaithful to their own pledge.

I'm to really believe that neither Tim not Rhonda would be bothered by the thought that, forced to choose, their spouses would PREFER sex with their sibling...?

If they also would PREFER sex with each other to sex with either of the siblings, then why bother engaging in sex with their spouses at all...? And for that matter, really, why bother staying married...?

"I love you, Tim, but sex with you doesn't compare to with Paul."

That's an ego booster if I ever heard of one...

This is possibly the most realistic story I have read on this site. The emotionalism was very realistic and the participants actually helped themselves with no jealousy. A good family with a long sex life available. The swapping may very well end itself voluntarily. Great effort.

I, like a lot of the other comments, usually don't go for such long (or mega chapter) stories but I saw this one to the end and I'm glad I did. Sure there were a few little rough spots but what the hell, it was better that 95% of the other stories I've ever read here.

I'd so love to read a follow-up to see how things develop, but please don't include mom and dad as one person suggested. You've set the stage for another great story.

Simply fucking awesome!

Yes a few rough spots. Who doesn't have a spot. :)

Great setup

and the wages of passion is liberation!!!

justice has been served

and a merry time had by all :)

great pacing and characterization

almost flawless, great job *****

One of the finest erotic stories I’ve read on Lit. Great character descriptions that really fill out all of their personalities. It kept me wanting to read more to see how everything turned out.

Anyway, love the story! Which you'd publish more frequently. Definitely of the best writers on here.

How about more chapters about how this plays out... great story

Good one but that damn Rhonda got the best of the deal Paul weak ass should at least have beat her cheating ass when he discovered her treachery...and that stupid Sharon had some nerves getting hot after she had messed up Tim head. Anyway...😁😁

Don't know if you are still writing, but you should follow this up with parts 2-9. You are one of the best writers on this site. Believable characters, good dialog, interesting plots, and with just the right amount of sex. Too many writers have long sex scenes which actually get boring after a while. Thanks for another great one.

I really enjoyed the story with all the build up and drama. The story may seem a little long but sex was often and good which helped bring things to a head. Thanks for a happy ending.

Not good...

- Paul rapes his sister when she’s legally unable to consent; she should have been taken to the hospital and the police called on her boyfriend for drugging her in the first place

- While still in shock and possibly still under the influence, Sharon talks her brother into repeating the act

- Instead of the couples going for couples therapy, Tim and Rhonda commit adultery

I like a lot of the incest stories, but this one just didn’t make much sense at all...

Lost interest when Tim was encouraging his wife to fuck another man.

Ruined the fantasy.

WOW, just wow. GREAT story line. The whole college incident bothers me but it's necessary to the story.

absolutely fantastic; it is so good that I can feel almost that it is me in their place, The story is long but I don't think any of it could condense, It does seem that the erection is erected a bit to soon after the climax.

I have read so many exciting, well written and well thought out stories in Literotica but yours exceed the best of them. You might have ruined me for anything less fanciful and erotic. Thank you, thank you for the great images and wet lap!

Plot is far-fetched, yet predictable, and full of useless drivel. The religious scripture is wholly unnecessary and diminishes from the story line. Also the date rape drug/incest beginning is disturbing and not the least bit erotic. Any, and all sex, between 2 or more consenting adults is pleasurable and should be experienced by all to have a healthy and enjoyable sex life. I would expect the same of a supposedly erotic story. Epic FAIL on many accounts. Keep writing submissions for Penthouse Forum and try to hone your writing skills, continuity, and content. 1 star because half a star isn't an option.

Fantastic story that needs a follow up

This author writes fucking good stories. Or rather good fucking stories..