All Comments on 'Slow Dancing with a Fast Woman'

1 Star

Worth the long read too.

Nonsense

another great one from you. thank you. Love how you crafted this love story. 2 people in love, but trust lacking. you find them a unique way to gain trust.. wonder why Ano won't put his name to such mindless dribble he spews on. Screw him. great story

Don't get your anonymous kommentators. Pfft?

Thank you for a fabulous effort, and for sharing it.

Merry Christmas!!!

Firstly, a 5+. Thought the story was well thought out with characters of depth and was immensely satisfied after reading it. And then I noticed the anonymous commentators with 1's and dislikes (and with only 5 commentators at this time!). To receive 5's and 1's means you, qhml1, hit the big time. You struck a chord but for some, without humor, without sympathy, without empathy, they hated it ...big time. You provoked them. For the others (including me) with those traits, you hit the gong - another excellent effort to appreciate. For me, I have an automatic reaction, qhml1, must read. I react that way for no more than 3 or 4 others on this site. My comment: thank you and keep your pens full of ink (well, in a manner of speaking)...keep your computer full of electrons.

I greatly appreciate you sharing your talent with us. Couldn't wait when I saw your name on the list. Read one of your stories yesterday and thought it would be great if you posted another. Thank you for the tale. 5

I love the characters. You did a very nice job of voicing this from Bandit's pov. I thought Mel could have been a little more loving and desirable, but that's a quibble.

5+

Just brilliant!

Well done sir. A story that is sure to stir the creative juices in our other top shelf writers in LW I don't know how you can surpass this one but that's what we thought about your last story.

A Very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year and a wish of health, wealth and happiness from ours to yours

Your story was wonderful, your added character to each person. You made them real. Thank you for sharing it with us.

My heart lept for joy when i saw you had a new story out. Did not disappoint. You still have it.

Now maybe finish the Houge Chronicles? Please?

Finally!!! You can't imagine how excited I was to see your name after a new story. The legend doesn't disappoint! Just a beautiful, emotional roller coaster (pardon the reference) of a tale. Is it too much to hope that you will craft more soon? You're one of my inspirations. Awesome story. Thank you so much.

A very good story...Maybe a little too long, but nevertheless worth the reading...4* MERRY XMAS TO ALL

and too boring. 1*

Another great story by a great author!

...took a while to finish but it was worth it.

I was a little taken back and confused at his blow up after the roommates fight. That seemed almost out of character for him. Also the way he proved her love seemed like it was almost cruel... I get he was dealing with trust issues (or so he kept saying) but a lot of the other things they were doing seemed to say different. Loved the ending. Turn about is fair play and what a way to tell him.

I cant believe he took a cheating slut for a wife after all that crap. Started out to be a good story. You expressed his killing abilities far too much. The guys who truly work outside the box do not talk about it; except with their peers . Keep writing.

Of course we come to expect that from you. So glad you are writing again. I enjoy your work but after reading each story for the fourth or fifth time it gets less exciting. It is good to have new stories to add to the mix.

A word to the hate Nazis who have made idiotic comments about your work. I challenge you to write something that ALL the readers will like and not have any negative comments. I challenge you to instead of saying you hate a story or an author to give reasons for your dislike. I challenge you sigh in so an author can reply to your rants.

qhml1, take no heed of any non constrictive critiques. Thanks for the hard work and hope to see another story soon.

Woodmanone

As good as ever 5 *****

Another. Great story from a writer too good for Literotica

Annie, I wondered what happened to you! I've missed you, baby. To all the others who took time out of this no doubt hectic period to read this, thank you. I just wanted to wish all peace and happiness during this time, and hope next year is even better for you.

And Annie, I know all you want this season is a bull for your wife. Reach out, I'm sure there's a reader or two willing to help you out, or knows someone who will. Network, Ann, network. Just Kidding, Annie, don't get pissed. Or do, you're rants are more endearing when you're angry. I'm just glad to give you an outlet to vent your frustrations on.

Merry Christmas, everybody!

Q

I NEVER would have bought the ending without the counseling and still have qualms. Love is a crapshoot at best without sullied track record. qhml1 and his megaskills, however, knows how to sweetalk the moderately skeptical reader into thinking the bets are hedged as best as humanly possible and taking daunting leap of faith. Hardcore BTBers will disdain that option and in this case I understand but don't agree.

They or she did damage, but amends were made to injured party as best as possible. Both main parties took extended time out but couldn't replace the void in heart and soul the break caused. Counseling brought clarity and countermeasures to repeat in dysfunctional behavior. Is it assured , things will work out ? HELL NO. But the fictional couple is motivated and I wish them well .

EXCELLENT job by q. in drawing and depicting spicy supporting cast. Runty, crazed, revenge bent hubby did 180 turnabout but not slutty, harpy roomies . Well played. Hooky intro sealed the deal. Full marks.*****

Very well done, excellent writing as always.

Let me begin telling you I am a great fan, love most of your stories and this is the first time I give you less than 4 stars.

Sadly I do not think there is a lot to like in this story; she is a cheater, she used her husband to pay for her education and make her something more than white trash, and when he was busy working for them (to provide for both of them) she found the time to go out and cheat on him.

Maybe I am bias, exactly the same happened to a good friend, it was difficult to bring him back from the dark but he finally did it. And she? Has been married 4 times total, maybe she is still looking for fulfilment. Maybe once a cheater always a cheater.

This is the kind of stuff I´m hoping to find here, only to be disappointed most of the time. Of course, you get the well deserved 10*. Damn, the scale seems to end at 5.

Love your stuff. Well written, and a really great story. I find that in the really great stories, the sex is relatively unimportant. Your stories are truly great and very easy to read and very satisfying. Thanks very much. I wish you and your family a wonderful holiday and healthy and happy New Year. And, most importantly, keep writing to keep all your fans happy. Enjoy!

...despite Melody somewhere in the story changed her name to "Melanie". Did that help Jess to get his trust back? (just kidding)

I like the underlying concept - do the "I married the wrong guy" plot with everyone agreeing with the realization rather than travelling in the feelings of being dissed.

I have a bit of a problem reconciling the age and actions of the protagonists - I swear they were teenagers by the end of the story. Which is to say, a bit sweet after the introspective insight. Not that it was too bad, but my dark and cynical soul doesn't go there easily.

Again - don't do this at home kiddies - save people at your own risk. There are disinterested professionals in the business (not that they have a good success rate and survive all that well either), and perhaps you should leave it to them.

Green-something

(and may the grace of the season fall on generous authors and readers...)

Not because there was anything wrong with the story, except that there was nothing there. The good guy is all good, there is no personality interaction to create any tension or anticipation. Saccharine sweetened cotton candy is how it comes across to me.

I had just finished reading 'It is in the wrong category.' And there, you had...well.

Here, I was amazed at how much I liked it on first read and without thinking about it.

Why?

1) Unlike most of qhml1's work, the guy was not a paragon of perfection (though it was close...I almost closed it in the first three paragraphs) who constantly got more and more successful after he 'ditched the bitch'. 'Needing an editor, You can't do that, and Terrible Taste in Tees, and all the Annies' are all examples of this mistake. Here, he WAS successful...but it was a moderate success, in a niche market and he didn't suddenly cure cancer and make a billion jillion dollars. He just...worked hard and made money.

2) It took a bold step in addressing a real conflict. Some of us...married early and unwisely. So it took head on the fact that maybe the woman (or man) made a mistake and instead of being stuck forever with a mistake, wanted to fix it. Poorly and thoughtlessly, but she tried to readjust her life. I can see her thought processes.

3) The guy had a hang up or two. Which is actually light years ahead of 'I ended up roasting a pig', who had no discernable flaws detectable to modern science.

4) I found her 'reveal' at the end to be inventive, cute and heartwarming, traits which I expect from qhml.

5) There was no strange nudity fetish in this story, nor interracial bisexual/lesbian couples to break SOD.

I find it implausible that the woman could deny her husband for six months.

I was dragged out of the story when the woman caught her THONG on her sneakers (still on) But somehow a THONG had trouble where the skin tight jeans had already slid over her shoes seamlessly. This was a reality jar which broke my engagement in the story. Little details which I would not discuss with someone of a lower caliber of writing skill.

Still, well done.

I liked it. I started out hating Mel on principle alone, and couldn't help but roll my eyes at her little sob story. I've seen it too many times, both in stories here and in real life; people using a not-so-stellar childhood as an excuse for being a shitty human being.

But things turned around when she didn't ask for anything in the divorce, and even reimbursed her ex for the cost of her education. I have to admit that I've never so much as heard of that before, let alone seen it. Whether in a story or otherwise, that's a new one to me. I can understand hopping onto a gravy train to save yourself and not loving said train. It's a terrible thing to do to a person, especially when they love you to the point of being willing to fight and die over you. But all too often we get these women who still go for the jugular in the divorce, under the logic that they deserve compensation for suffering the indignity of being worshiped by a man they never loved.

So major kudos for not only managing to surprise me, but for being able to make me NOT hate a cheater. Shit, I actually *wanted* her to have her happy ending!

5 stars from me. Pretty much the entire reason I read "Loving Wives" stories is because I like a good revenge tale. I like seeing the guilty punished, and I love it when the beaten and downtrodden finally have their day. So for me not to mind a story that, at best, features nothing but *failed* attempts at revenge, and focuses on a character who, in any other story, would be the "Bull", AND gives the cheater a fairy tale ending? That's a damn good story, IMO.

Great job

Five stars even if I got a tad lost in places, but I'm not sure I can blame you for that. This was a different take on everything this category stands for and it was a journey worth making. Good job and merry Christmas.

as always great writing. love how your stories have the twists and turns in them where the reader doesn't really don't know how the story is going to turn out. keep on writing.

FD made some good comments - appreciated a story about two flawed people. I am biased in that I always like Q's stories. Liked the ending; clever resolution of the trust issue. Well done as always!

Not the best thing you've ever done, but good enough I still gave it five stars.

And I liked the unspoken statement that sometimes, what it takes to regain trust is a leap of faith.

Lots of twists and turns. Good closure on all the loose ends of all characters

Liked it a lot but hate it when you break the magic of the story when you cant remember the name of the heroine.

Ok , 1st let me get the bad out of the way. I thought that the cat and mouse game the two lovers played was just a little over the top. Granted he really did live to his "code" for lack of a better term, but he came across as a almost conceited , Clint Eastwood style Anti-hero caricature. And as for Mel, my god, how many times did it take for her to see the writing on the wall ! It was kind of frustrating in a way to see them subject each other to such mental games, when deep down you could feel that they were destined for better or worse to be together ! It took a long ride, but I'm glad I went along on it with them !

Now, for the platitudes ! Qhml1, your writing is to me like Morgan Freeman's narrative voice. It just works on a level that brings a slight smile to my face without realizing its there ! I recently praised a JPB story on this site, calling him the King of the LW category, which I still stand by. But I did make one mistake, in the heading of that posting I said that JPB was the LW laureate. That was a mistake, because that title obviously belongs to you ! I hope that you will continue to bring us some more of your wonderful stories ! Your legions eagerly await !

...rarely follows absolutes. I liked this and could see trusting a woman not to cheat given this particular set of circumstances.

Melody wasn't like most of the female protagonists in RACC tales, but a girl who married for all the wrong reasons and then, after finding the one she was meant to be with, made a series of horribly bad choices.

A RACC wife has to make her choices with the intent of either hurting the one she professes to love or at least with indifference to that person. A BTB wife is the same as a RACC wife only worse ;)

It is always worth the effort to read your stories, which puts you in select company. In this case, though, you backed yourself into a corner and so we are left with this silly ending. Life's not about pointless gestures, it's about calculated risks. Why not just grow a pair and commit to her?

not the worst. Had some bright spots but a lot of dull fluff inbetween. 3*

or does it come down to Bad Guesses. TK U MLJ LV NV

However, it's so much better than much of the tripe that's published in this genre, that I gave it a five anyway.

but a good ok

I just couldn't warm up to Mel, and I couldn't get Jerry and Anna hooking them up.

I love your work and seeing your name I know you have another master piece to read. You really dragged there relationship out for a long separation before they found each other again.you ended. It beautifully. I read some of those annoy comments and wonder what dark world they live in. If you Don't burn her they are not happy. . sad to say

As someone else said below, I saw your name and seriously thought Christmas had come early. Can't wait for the next one.

Thank you for continuing to share your stories with us for free!

Happy Holidays!

C

I get marrying a man for security, escape, pregnancy, etc. She lacked the integrity to leave the marriage when she realized it was never going to work. But she was an opportunist, and hung on to the first husband until a better option came along. She wanted her cake and to eat it too, same as his volley ball slut. Both women were immature, shallow, greedy, and dishonest. If he was willing to wait for his woman to grow up, he might as well have reconnected with the volley ball slut. Its OK that he and Mel are a couple. Still doesn't answer the question, how long will it last? Guess that's a LW story to be written later, maybe.

Thanks for your time and effort.

It took a lot of work for them to get back together. I was worried for a while. Generally I do not like negative and emotional drama, I like it even less when counseling sessions drag on as we rehash all the points that got us there. You found a way to incorporate it without forcing the usual preachy psychobabble, and you made the Counselor almost likeable. Well done.

After all the angst, the little twist at the finish lifted my spirits and even brought the start of a smile.

Thank you

qhml, If the trolls don't like like your story, it must be a classic, because they took the time to at least comment and run it down. The story is very enjoyable with twists and turns, an excellent finish. There's nothing like a skilled artist either with paint or rock. Quality shows even in relationships and writing. A full five star effort.*****

Thank you qmhl1 for a very entertaining story . The ending didn't work for me .But I understand . You have a desire for happily-ever-after finishes to your stories. So I gave you 4*s .

Eagerly I await the next story .

AMerryman

Really enjoy your work and this story is no exception. You are terrific at exploring the characters and I identify with them. Jesse had great depth of character and a robust background and history. He'd been bitten a couple of times and was naturally overly shy and his reticence was understandable when it came to reconciling with Melody. Another very good story with a nice plot and conclusion!!

Thank you and please keep writing!

These sorts of stories are just to impossible to be believed. The idea that you can be involved with somebody and plan to marry them BUT not know the Major details of their life before they met you ...is just pathetically stupid and totally unrealistic. We see this idiotic plot device in many of the different LW stories and it never works and it is never believable.

Yes as usual the writing is just fabulous and the story really moves quite nicely but the premise here is just too ridiculous to be believed. When Melody and Jess start going out and getting serious they tell each of their life stories ... The family backgrounds ...the work history etc .

Melody knowing what Jess has gone through with his previous relationships consciously decides to NOT tell him that she is in dying or dead marriage.

Exactly how does she think that's going to work out?

When Jess proposes marriage to her ...Melody says not now but maybe in six months or year. How does she think this is going to work out? Does she REALLY think that if they were to get married a year later ... Jess would NOT ask about why she wanted to wait one year?

I realize that Melody has some issues and was trying to have a fallback position with her 1st husband (Jerry ) if things with Jess did not work out. But that that is a totally different issue. Knowing Jess previous relationship history for her to hide something like this for so many months is just a deal breaker. It simply impossible to get past

This is an interesting, refreshing take off from a time-worn theme. The story line is excellent and the character developments are thorough and believable.

The ending won't please a lot of readers, but I think it suits the characters and leaves enough to the imagination of the reader to provide suitable entertainment.

The dialog is well above the average story found here.

All in all, an enjoyable read.

Would have really enjoyed this if you didnt make Jerry so stupid. 3*

Several editing issues ... but, first - 5*- . OK, that's out of the way! Cindy was starting to come on to Our Hero, but no planned dating, yet. One of her wing-gals (Becca ... maybe AKA Becky?) wants to travel 'with' him (for what sounded like about a week-long job) to document a successful blue-collar operation. Cindy wasn't happy. Next, OH is getting frisky with a young sweet thing ... no Big Casino yet, but decidedly frisky! I guess the 'work week' culminated with nothing interesting going on, because it is finally revealed that the 'Frisky Partner' is Cindy - NOT Becca!

Second quibble has already been briefly mentioned, but forgetting the name of your title-woman is really lazy (and easy to check by doing a search for 'Mel' and BOOM it shows Melody for several pages, then Melanie for the last several! Only about four or five characters need such a check (assuming it is too hard to do a final read-thru while alert!)

There Is a character-change that needs (IMHO) more work, where Sweetie goes from a trailer-trash financially dependant woman who hooked her wagon to a dim star to a lonesome responsible professional (loosening the hook) to madly in True Love! Possible ... sure ... but needs more-convincing development.

I have always thought that the moment I catch a person lying to another person, I have to discard as friends or paramours. If they lie to other people why would not they do the same to me. So my reaction to Melody was very violent even though later on she claims that she shut Jerry at that point and was faithful to Jesse. Still our image of people changes with time and the rest of the story is fun even though I doubt that I could imitate Jesse in a similar situation. five stars.

the main character was a bit of a dick, terrorizing women and taking pleasure in it. Not my kind of hero or someone I can really root hard for.

started good, was thinking (easy 5, maybe 5+) then the blowout with her roomies, followed by the hard to understand bailout scene, jump to the weird counseling session, then BAM! back together and pregnant...THE END. Huh? I nearly bailed during the counseling, the whole story just seemed lost and without much to recommend. OK, truth time - I skimmed to the end to see if hey got back together. I think they are...dancing in the thunderstorm, riding the coaster...right?

I loved it.

I hope you will write more and please dont wait so long

A little long but I really enjoyed your story. Loved the ending!

There were a few frustrating areas but the ending pulled everything together and I really liked the dancing in the rain part. That was sheer genius! I'm sure you guessed by now...5 big stars.

Another very well written story that drags the reader up and down the emotional roller coaster of people's lives. That was one of the great things about it. Neither of these were perfect characters. She's a cheater, insecure in her place in life, given her "trailer trash" upbringing. He tends towards a lot of seemingly repressed anger. Probably should have been in jail after threatening Jan and Juan Pablo (you know those hot tempered Spaniards don't like to be upstaged!). Two things bothered me. After a lot of years in construction I know 2 great masons that could lay both wet and dry walls and build things that were as close to perfect as stone can be. And I thought that their couples counselor seemed to give up too soon. Maybe at the end of the story his participation got short shrift, but a good head shrinker can work wonders. Although the ending line was predictable, it still read well and I was happy that they overcame their own short comings to reach a happy ending. More stories like this would be appreciated. Well done.

Half the story was talking about Jess' super human ability to defeat any opponent. ""Jan, did I ever tell you I was in the Army? I spent two years in the desert, killing people as often as I could."- Horseshit! Flash Alert! In combat situations the other side as the annoying habit of shooting back.

Stay away from the schoolyards you nonce!

I liked the story. It was a good reading experience. Yes I do agree there were some grammar that could have been caught with editing but it did not take away from the story. I don't normally comment or even notice edit but it did give me pause twice when I was reading. It was not like I did not know what the writer was writing. Overall the storyline and characters were well written and told a story worth my time reading. To be fair I will always check out qhml1 stories when I see them. I enjoy the writing style, storylines and characters developed in all I have read which I think is most if not all the postings. So please continuing writing and I will keep reading. Thank you for posting!

. . . even though there were a few flaws in it. Is it my imagination or did the girl start out being Melody and end up being Melanie? I didn't like the two odious roommates. And I thought the business of the two lovers blowing hot and cold over and over was overdone to the point of being tiresome and certainly unrealistic. But I liked Jesse and I've always liked stone walls so I stuck with the story to the end. Give a competent editor a chance to clean it up and you've got a world beater here.

the only problem on LIT is a stupid troll named bonnietaylor2 alias vastiesmith2. I'm reporting every flaming comment you post on this site. If other people are as tired as I am by this moron's trolling, please take ten seconds of your time and do the same.

@troll

who the fuck gives you the right to bash people for their ratings? You don't even READ the fucking stories!!! Your only purpose here is to flame!!!

what is this anon bullshit? the fact that you log in with a bogus name gives you more rights than other people? that only proves that you wasted one minute to create a disposable mail account. maybe in your STUPIDITY you don't realize that EVERY fucking comment on the net is anonymous, unless you start posting a copy of your fucking ID.

everyone has their own opinions and rates the stories accordingly. read the fucking stories and do the same for a change. if that's too difficult for you, go fuck yourself, but do it somewhere else.

The haters don't understand the heartache of love betrayed and the pain of rekindling the trust needed to go forward with reconciliation. The counsellor said it best, you must find the grace within yourself to allow the relationship to go forward. Trust is a gift you give that you and your partner renew by honoring it every day with your actions.

Excellent story and mostly felt like a real story , not like these stories where the girlfriend or wife is fucking the guys with the biggest dicks around . Hope to see more of this couple in a second chapter

I don't find him trusting her to be plausible even after her becoming a Mary Sue. And I felt that the drama dragged on, possibly because I wasn't invested in the heroine. But it was a nice read for the most part and I appreciate the effort 3/5

A bit long, but what the heck. People are complex, the sum of their pasts. We do learn from our mistakes, and sometimes avoid repeating them. We are all sinners, but we often find the way to redemption within ourselves. It is true, once a drunk, always a drunk. My father was a drunk, but was sober from the time I was born, for 40 years.

Life is about conquering fears, and these characters did.

Chilley

About Mel's first marriage. It's a common theme in LW for the impoverished, desperate woman, often with kids, to be 'rescued' by a nice guy. In heartfelt gratitude she marries him and they live happily ever after.

I think such desperation makes a poor foundation for a marriage, and Mel proves the point. She realized in time she didn't love her husband, and wasnt likely to in the future. Life in a loveless marriage for the rest of your life? Would you want that?

Chilley

Not just hats, but my jacket goes off to you, as well as my sweater, belt, shoes, socks, pants, shirt, underw--well maybe not that far.

Anyways, I feel this deserves way more than the current score of 4.67. You are a motherfucking sorcerer of erotic writing. I truly believed every emotion was genuine, and not words on a page (or screen). I loved how you mnaged to make the characters believable in their actions and behaviour.

One thing though, I find it hard to believe that no one else shared Jesse's belief of "one strike, you're out". Everyone seemed to sympathize with Melody, being protective of her and trying to get them back together. I'm just finding it hard to wrap my head around the fact that she cheated on her previous hubby with Jesse, so she was not being completely honest, then barely anyone took Jesse's side. Putting these little nuances aside however, I'm a big fan of all your work, and this one did not fall short of my expectations by any means. Thank you.

Did I miss something? When did she divorce her second husband David? She was at the wedding of Jerry...and wasn't she still married to David? Then she slow danced with the hero of the story? So what happened with her second husband?

Awesome story. 5*'s

But more importantly, I see a host of wonderful authors commenting on this story, who haven't written anything in a long while. So great to see q back. Now how about the rest of you? We miss quality writing here.

I periodically check my favorite authors and I was thrilled to see you had some new stories. This one did not disappoint. I do get confused when two people profess love, yet can't trust. I think the two are linked strongly: it is very hard to believe someone you love would break your trust- it's a blind spot. In any case, maybe I've never felt that combination but perhaps it exists. Clearly a 5 for this fine story.

Wonderful story, well written and most enjoyable.Please keep on!

David is the second husband of Cindy. The volleyball player he dated in college not Melody. Becky was Cindy's friend not Melodys.

Loved the ending and the RULES

I have enjoyed reading.

No, it was not alright for her to lie to him. No, it was not alright for her to date while married. Yes, he had every reason to run as far away from her as possible. But the twist happened when the former husband brought the two of them back together at his own wedding. Unique is not creative enough but I can't think of a better word.

Sounds like every woman in the story either wasn't interested in him long enough for more than a few dates or couldn't be honest with him. Not being compatible is OK, but lying to him because their own agenda is different is not acceptable. Either 'We're too far apart and I can't do this' or 'I'm married and shopping around for someone else' may not keep them together but it is much better than the lying. Lying only causes mistrust and that will never work.

Never marry a psycho bitch. And this

"Melody" was definitely (to use a

technical term), nutty as a fruitcake.

Be nice to have a realistic update on

Their marriage 5 years down the road.

A good read, enjoyable story. I did not want to stop reading. More sex next time.

The author has unlimited leeway in the direction of any "relationship" that results from meeting a woman in a bar. What is expected of the kind of women who hang out in bars? Not much by my experience. Anything goes, so enjoy what the author makes of it.

re:

meeting a woman in a bar

That depends on the hows and whys of her being in the bar.

A woman out with friends for a few drinks and dancing is very different from a barfly or a woman looking to be picked up.

The story about the volleyball player was more interesting than the rest of it. The end didn't seem to have any flow to it.

It was a good read. Liked the beginning and the middle. The end was confusing. Parts of it were unclear, some motives behind the seemingly irrational occurrences weren't remotely obvious, and I couldn't understand why she kept pulling away. The revenge idea from the counselor could work I guess, but that doesn't make enough sense in my head. But whatever. It was well written overall, and I enjoyed the story.

Enjoyed It! A nice romantic tale. Right up my alley.

Each time I read one of your stories, I am amazed that you are writing them for free.

I truly believe you are one of the few that can do it professionally.

That being said, my opinion is that this one was too long.

It had maybe 1 or 2 too many stop/start will they/wont they "almosts" before the deserved happy ending. At one point I just had to stop reading because it was getting, hmm don't know the right word, frustrating maybe, knowing the time for the story to end had got to its natural point, only for one of them to balk again.

Hope that made sense. But, it did turn from a very good to great story to a so so to good.

You sir are a great writer and I want to thank you for sharing your talent with me. I hope you keep on posting stories on here they are a pleasure to read.

It's always wonderful to read a story that ends well. It's even better when the characters aren't muscle-bound geniuses with millions of dollars wooing the stacked, prefect 10 former cheerleader.

Thank you for continuing to write top-notch stories with engaging characters!

and convoluted mind but you are a good writer. Scotty

Thanks you for this story. It was nice to see a good guy get the happiness wished for. It was also great to see forgiveness for imperfection and human weaknesses.

Please give us more like this.

by one of my favorite authors. Nice ending, she was flawed but redeemable which upsets the BTB crowd, but keeps the suspense until the ending. Please keep writing.

That just seems like some religious training that's supposed to kick in for the writer as a happy Catholic ending.

I'm not sure I could get back with her. I'm a fan of forgiveness but sometimes loving someone is not enough of a reason to get back together.

I still don't understand why she dumped him after he lectured her roommates. How was his actions supposedly showing his distrust of her? He defended her and himself.

for trouble.

Young men, if you want to maximize your chances, pick a woman who has shown by her behavior she can be trusted. Pick a woman whose parents are still together or were together till death parted them. If both grandparents stayed together as well, that's even better. Your heart is quivering in love and you are willing to take the chance with a girl like the one in this story? Ask yourself if you want to inflict her on your children. Because that's what you will likely be doing.

Not to bright for ENGAGED golfer to admit in magazine he arranges schedule so he can see volleyball player girlfriend.

That tidbit in your story seemed like goof on your part.