All Comments on 'The Dress'

This may or may not be a good story. When I get distracted by improper use of the English language in the first paragraph of a story I read no further. In the first paragraph you use the term "fully fledged". The correct term, per The Merriam-Webster Dictionary, is full-fledged. Clean up your errors and I will try to read this again.

Fully fledged is correct UK English.

I do wish some US citizens would stop assuming that the way they speak and write is the only way.

Your rambling fantasy life did nothing for me, silly story.

It just didn't feel that erotic. Plus the use of terms like "love tunnel" kinda broke the mood. There was potential, though. Maybe on the next story you should use an editor from the Editor's Forum. I would also suggest having this story critiqued in the Story Discussion Circle (also a forum). They'll give you constructive criticism, not incoherent ramblings as you can often get on the public comments. Like I said, there's definatly potential. You're not afraid to experiment with vocabulary and style which is something good. That alone can be the seed to a great writer.

This is another story that I wish you would add a few more chapters. I absolutely love stories that involve interracial berween white women and black men.. and I was hoping she would end up going to work for the black club owner. That was really hot the way he just took her the way he did, expecially without any resistance what-so-ever. I loved that...