An Upside-down “Y”

"You're beautiful, Ky. I'm just stating fact." He took another hefty sip of his drink.

She thought for a few moments before continuing the memory. "Your hands moved to my arms, like... like the other times, you stroked, felt every inch of me that wasn't covered." She recalled how his fingers had gotten so close to her pussy and how she had to fight with herself not to finally push or jerk her crotch under his fingers. She recalled she had nearly been panting during it, and then definitely had been a minute or two later. "You... you then massaged me with your face."

She had felt not only his lips touching her skin, but then his hot, moist breath above her pussy through her cotton panties. She nearly had an orgasm when he reached her hands and reversed course, but instead of just stroking, he started kissing and sometimes the tip of his tongue would draw a wet line on her skin as his face moved. "Then... then when you had your face at the bottom of my pushed up shirt, you pushed it more, right to where my boobs started, your face stroked over my... my covered breasts, then... you got on top of me."

Ted squirmed on his seat again. "Ahh... I probably shou..."

She interrupted, "You were... hard, weren't you?"

"Kyli, listen... I'm really sor..."

She broke in again, "Were you? Did you have an... an erection?"

He wasn't sure what the tone of her voice meant, if anything. "I..." He exhaled. "Yeah. I was hard. Ky, listen, I'm sor..."

She spoke over him again, "Then you kissed my neck while your face moved around and your hands caressed and slowly slid up my arms, and... and..." She closed her eyes at the memory, the utterly erotic and intense sensuality of that moment so long ago. "You... you rubbed your... hardness against me."

Ted felt overwhelmed with guilt. He glanced at her. Kyli's eyes were closed. He wondered if she was about to start crying. He cleared his throat and was about to beg her forgiveness when she spoke softly.

"I pushed up as you stroked. I... I had never been so excited... so turned on, Ted. You kept stroking right on my... between my legs and I kept pushing up, over and over again for a few minutes, and then... then you abruptly stopped. I wanted you to keep doing it but... but I was afraid to tell you that. I-I had a boyfriend for a while junior year, and he and I kissed and touched a little, but... that night with you on my bed, I... that was my hottest sexual experience during high school. Maybe... it was the firstrealsexual experience for me. It-itwasmy first real experience. Why... why did you stop?"

Ted shifted his ass again. She had to know. "Why do youthink?"

"Were... were you close to having an orgasm too?"

He glanced at her. He knew she had been turned on but he didn't think she had been close to an orgasm. "Wereyou?"

"Yes...godyes. Couldn't you tell?"

"Couldn'tyoutell I was too?"

Kyli took a deep breath and sighed. She had wondered for eight years why he had stopped, if her getting so close to peaking had grossed him out or something. "I... I was blindfolded."

Ted almost laughed. He kept it to a grin. "Yeah, Ky... I wasveryclose. That's why I stopped."

"But then... you did it again, after you turned me over. Remember? You got my feet out of the loops, then told me to turn onto my tummy, the pillow still under my hips, you re-looped my ankles to the footboard, and... and then you stroked your face and kissed the back of my legs, all the way up to the edge of my panties, then over my buns, and up my back to my neck. That felt so nice around my neck and you pushed your face in my hair, then, and... and then you lay on me again, holding most of your weight off me with your elbows like you had when I was face up, and... and then you stroked your thing against my butt, be-between my buns, and... and I pushed up towards you again, and you... you kissed my neck again while your hands slid on the sheet and held my elbows. You kept stroking, pressing down and I kept pushing up. I heard you breathing so loud and fast and I was too, and-and sometimes I wasn't sure whose breathing it was." She wasn't surprised she remembered every detail.

She took a sip of her drink. "And then... and then, like the very first time, we heard Mom and Dad coming home, and you sprang off the bed and got my feet out of the tie loops while I got my hands out of the loops and took the blindfold off, and then you got the ties off the footboard spindle things while I shoved the others behind the mattress and... and-and then you were gone before I even turned over. You had closed the door behind you really quietly. Then I heard Mom coming up the stairs just as I was getting up to turn off the dresser lamp, so I grabbed some book and switched on the lamp on the bedside table, got under the covers and pretended to be reading when she tapped on my door and opened it."

He spoke fast, "Kyli, I'm so damn sorry, I... Inevershould have doneanyof that. I... I'm sorry."

"You... you really had... um... an erection?"

"I did, yeah, I'm... I'm sorry. I really am. I-I never should have done any of that."

"May I... I ask you something about it?"

"Ahh... yeah. What?" He held his breath.

"Did you have an erection because you were thinking of Darlene or... or because you were with me?"

He wondered if lying would be best. He knew he was too wasted to pull off a lie. "I had a... a hard-on... an erection, because I was... with you."

Kyli had been holding her breath too. She exhaled. "Oh." She felt relieved after years of wondering now and then.

His gut was still tensed. "Do... do you hate me, Ky?"

"Huh?"

"Do you hate me for that night?"

"No. Not at all. Maybe... maybe I'd be mad a little if you had said you had been thinking ofDarlenethat night."

He waited a few moments to see if she'd add anything. She didn't. "I... I was only thinking of you that night."

"We... we never played that game after that."

"Yeah, I know."

"Why?"

Her question surprised him for a couple reasons. "I think you justfigured outwhy."

They were both silent for over a minute.

Kyli spoke softly, almost a whisper, "You sort of played it another time."

"Huh? No we didn't. I... Kyli,come on. I went too far, and... and hell, I knew I couldn't trus' myself anexttime."

"I di'n't saywe, I saidyou." She took a slow breath. Her eyes teared for a moment.

"Huh?"

"A few months later, June or July, Mom and Dad went up to the Bensen's cottage to spend like a week, maybe ten days... something like that. You and I were home alone, we both had summer jobs, and... and you asked Darlene to come up and visit that weekend,four daysactually."

Ted's gut tightened but he still didn't know what she was talking about regarding the 'game.' "You... you didn't like her much."

"No, Ididn't. That's... that's why I went to stay a couple days at Barb's, then at Lara's house. I didn't like her at all, and...yousuggested I go and do some sleepover with one of my friends after that first night she was here."

Ted frowned. He had been so horny that summer. Darlene had gotten him hooked, nearly turning him into a sex addict, even though he knew he'd never fall in love with her, that there wasn't any chance of the relationship going anywhere. "I was a jerk. Sorry."

"Youwere." She clenched her jaw for a few seconds. "I saw you two... you two playing the game, the game I thought was... was onlyourgame."

"Huh? No I didn't."

"Yeah, you did. Isawyou two."

"Huh? We nev..." He stopped talking, then stopped breathing for a few moments. He mumbled, "Oh...shit."

"It was that first night I went to stay at Barb's. I left around 7:00 that evening, then when I got over to her house, I realized I left my cell phone in my room, so... around 8PM I went back home by myself, and... and went up to my room to get it, and-and I... I heard you with Darlene in your bedroom. And then-and then..."

She took a breath as her stomach knotted tighter. She knew she shouldn't have said anything about it. Was it because she'd had a few drinks? Was it because she was back home, alone with Ted again? Why had she been thinking about it so much since Mom said he was coming in to see them off too?

Ted groaned silently. He knew what she had probably overheard. He and Darlene had tried the bondage thing after spring break when he had used the ties on Ky, and then when she was over for the visit. It had to be that night.

"Isawyou andDarleneon your bed. She... she was on your bed, her wrists and ankles tied to the bed, like... like I had been a couple months earlier."

Oh jeezuz... she fucking saw us!He mumbled again, "Ahhh... crap." He now remembered he hadn't closed the bedroom door. There wasn't any reason to. They had been alone in the house. At least he thought they would be.

"I stood in the hall and... and I saw you-youfuckingher and you stopped and turned her over and looped her ankles again and... and you... you did anal with her." She felt the old anger, jealousy, and tears rising once again. "I... Ihatedyou that night. I-I know I shouldn't have, but... but I felt you had betrayed me. You-you had her tied up in the upside-down 'Y' just like you did with me and... and I thought I had been just a-apracticefor you. That-that I was sostupidfor thinking you had been as excited as I had gotten the last time we played thatstupidgame, and... and I know I shouldn't have been but I was so... so damnangryandhurtabout it all."

He waited a few moments again to see if she had more to say. "I... I've never wanted to hurt you, Ky."

"Well... youdidthat night or-or, I don't know, maybe I hurt myself. I... it was all socrazyand I got so-so... sojealous." She felt like crying just as she did that night on her way back to Barb's and later that night too. She told herself to get control of her emotions. She quickly wiped her eyes with her fingers. "It's... that's why I... I hardly spoke to you for a year."

He squirmed again. He had noticed it the rest of that summer, she barely spoke to him and never wanted to do anything with him, and the same that following Christmas when they were both home from college. He had always thought it was because of the last time they played 'what if.' He wondered if he should tell her the truth. The sober part of his brain was getting pushed aside by the loaded part. "Ky... that night, I..." He stopped speaking, trying to restrain himself. He knew he'd tell her.

"What?" She wiped her nose with the back of her hand.

"It... it was the other way round."

"Wha'... wha' does tha' mean?"

"I was with Darlene but... ahhh... I was... I was like pretending it was you I was with, not... not her." He shifted his ass again. For the most part, at least some part of it he had been wishing that, not really pretending but as he shoved his cock into Darlene's nice, tight cunt or her hot, gripping asshole, he'd realize how much he wished it was Kyli with him tied to the bed and they were doing what he was doing with Darlene. His voice was low, nearly a murmur, "I-I wished it was you with me."

"You're... you're lying, you're jus' saying that."

He looked at her. "No. No, it's not a lie. I... I wished it was you. Ky, it...noneof those times we played thatstupidgame had anything to do with any other girl than you, even... even the very first time."

He took a breath. "That's the weird part of you being adopted, I... Ialwaysthought of you as my sister, yet... when you got older, or... maybe it was whenIgot older, I... I sometimes wished you... you weren't my sister so... so we could do what... so I could bemorethan abrotherto you. But... I never...neverwanted to hurt you and-and that last time we played that damn game, it... I-I got out of control, it... I couldn't fool myself into believing it was just some stupid, teasing game anymore, not after that last time. And what you saw with Darlene, I... I wanted you in my bed not her that night. I'm... I'm sorry... jeezuz,pleasedon't hate me now. I'm so damn sorry. I just couldn't help thinking about you like that sometimes. I'm sorry, jus'...please...don't hate me."

Kyli knew she felt the opposite. She loved him. She always had. Maybe that was why her marriage hadn't worked out, maybe it was the main hidden reason, not all the other apparent ones. "I... I don't hate you at all, Ted." The air felt electric with emotional and sexual tension. There was silence for a full minute again. "Wha'... wha' are you thinking?"

Ted was thinking about their last time playing 'what if.' He was wondering what might have happened if he had fully given in to his desires. He stopped breathing for a few moments realizing that Mom and Dad would probably have caught them screwing. "Huh?"

"You got... quiet. Wha' are you thinking about?"

Ted almost smiled. He wondered how many times some chick had asked him that. Some of those times he had been thinking about Kyli while he was with those other girls. "I was thinking 'bout that last time we played and... how much I... I wanted to do what... how much I wanted to make love with you, an'... an' wondering what might have happened if Mom and Dad hadn't come home when they did."

"I've wondered tha'... tha' too." She had never been so turned on as she had been that night. Maybe that wasn't true. She thought of her time with Tom for a moment. Yes, it was true.

Another pregnant pause ensued, which turned into an awkward long silence. Kyli broke it. Her voice was very soft, just above a whisper, "I'm going in to... take a shower, after that do... umm... do you wanna play... play 'what if?'"

Ted couldn't believe his ears. "Are... are you kiddin' around?" He didn't look at his crotch but he bet it was visually throbbing.

"Ne... n-nevermind." She put her hands on the arms of the chaise to get up. Ted's hand covered hers. She stopped moving and looked at him in the moonlight.

He was too drunk to debate himself about whether what he wanted and what it seemed Kyli wanted was right, moral, or good. "Ky... yeah, of course I want to. Are... are yousureyou want to?"

"Ye... I... Ted..." She took a breath and exhaled slowly. "I'm not sure about anything anymore, but... but I want some answers. I-I want to find out what it would've been like tha' las' time if... if we weren't interrupted." She felt breathless for a few moments at the truth she had just released.

He gave her hand a squeeze. "I think I still have those neckties with the stuff I've never taken out of my bedroom closet."

"Does... does that mean you wanna... play it again?"

"Yeah, but... areyousure?"

Her stomach knotted and she felt a gazillion butterflies alight within her. She whispered breathlessly, "Yes. With... with the neckties?"

His cock leaped in his crotch. He nodded. "Yeah, with them, if they're still in my room." He knew they were. He took a slow breath. "I'll take a shower too, then... then come to your room."

"All right."

As he stood he quickly adjusted the bulge in his pants. He grabbed his glass then held out his other hand for Kyli. She took it and rose from the chaise, taking her glass from the little table. They slowly walked to the house. Ted let her hand go as he opened the patio door. He glanced at her ass as she stepped inside. He wanted to rip her clothes off right now, but even half wasted, he wanted to give her a little time to think it over. He followed her in. "Give me your glass. You can start your shower. I'll make us a couple new drinks before I take mine."

"I jus' want ice water, 'kay?"

"Sure."

Kyli headed towards the stairs. She almost felt as if she was in a dream. Maybe she was about to do what always had been a dream. She was both scared and very excited. She knew her pussy was still moist. She entered her room closing the door behind her. She recalled how Ted had complained to Mom and Dad that she got the room with the private bathroom when they moved from the old house. The memory made her smile softly and a little less scared.

She had unpacked her suitcase so she went to her old dresser, opened a drawer and pulled out a mens white cotton tank undershirt and a pair of white cotton bikini panties. One of a half dozen different color pairs she had bought on sale at Victoria's Secret. She lay the garments on the bed and went into the bathroom. She turned on the shower and undressed. The butterflies were still going crazy inside her.

Ted carried the drinks upstairs to his bedroom. He looked for the neckties and found them in the dresser with some other old clothes he hadn't bothered to take with him. He grinned when he discovered the black cotton parachute pants. He decided he'd wear them to her room. His smile waned. There was no turning back for him about this. He wanted her, had wanted her for years.

He told himself to ask if she was sure again before anything happened. He knew he was half looped and she had to be as drunk he was, even if she had a drink or so less than him. She couldn't weigh much more than a hundred pounds. He figured she was at most, 5'-3", about five inches less than his height. He had those inches and at least 45 pounds on her to soak up some of the alcohol. Maybe she was more wasted than he was. He hoped she wasn't. He didn't want her to hate him in the morning, or sooner. He'd never be able to deal with that. It would devastate him. She was the only girl he really cared about. The only girl he had ever really loved.

He told himself to stop worrying about it. They were both adults, although he had yet to actually feel like an adult. He undressed and walked across the hall to the bathroom. He recalled how pissed he had been that Ky got the bedroom with the private bath when they moved from the smaller house. He grinned as he turned on the shower.

He brushed his teeth as the water warmed up, then stepped into the shower. He grabbed the shampoo and poured some in his palm. He wondered for a moment if he was thinking way too much with his dick. He told himself again they were adults and they had both wondered about it for years. He wanted her. He had since he was a teenager, yet he didn't want to lose her as a sister because of his lusty desires. He started shampooing. No, it was much, much more than lust.

Kyli finished with the hair dryer and then put on a tiny bit of makeup. She never wore much. She went into the bedroom. Butterflies were still going crazy as she put on the white panties and white, mens tank undershirt. She checked herself in the dresser mirror and her hands fussed with her hair a little. Her heart was racing. She knew she was a little drunk. She knew that was fuzzing her judgment. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew it was helping her rationalize, and she kept telling herself that neither she nor Ted had said they were going to have sex. Did they? They were just going to play the 'what if' game, that's all. Right?

She turned and walked to her bed. She pulled the comforter down leaving the top sheet in place, then decided to take comforter complete off. She piled it on the upholstered arm chair. She sat on the edge of the bed. She had one of the bedside table lamps on. She could nearly hear her heart beating. She glanced at the bedside table drawer and her heart rate quickened for a few moments. She wondered if she should lie down and pretend to be asleep as she used to. She felt nervous, then realized it was excitement, not nervousness. She had wanted this to happen since she was eighteen, maybe before that if she really thought about it. She heard a couple light knocks on her door. More butterflies alighted in the already crowded space within her. She felt breathless again for a moment. "Come in."