by TysonsHome
I could not get past the first few paragraphs, your mixing past and present tense was so annoying.
A phrase like "she's had quite large boobs." - not even sure what it means. are they big now?
At times you switched tenses within a single sentence, such as:
"She had to know what she is doing."
-and-
"and it was pretty obvious that there are no undergarments there."
sloppy, sloppy writing.