Book 02: A Match Made Ch. 03

"I don't know, honey. All of this has happened so quickly I haven't had the time to think much about it, let alone talk to Kara. I'll have time this weekend to do both. I'll let you know as quickly as I can, okay?"

"Of course. I'm so happy for you, Mom. I know you are too. Say hi to Kara for me, please." I motioned to Kara, who shook her head no. I winked.

"You know I will, Jenna. Give the baby a kiss from me and give her and Ian both my love. I love you. Talk soon."

I called JR, too. The call went pretty much like it did with Jenna. Then it was time to talk for a while.

"I hope you're not upset, Lissy. I love the kids. I'm just not quite ready for all the questions and things."

"Christmas is right around the corner, sweetie. JR, Andi, Rach and June have all been invited. There won't be many people here but Dylan will be here as well. Are you going to be okay with that?"

"I don't know. That's the honest to god truth. I guess we'll have to see. What did Jenna want to know? Are you going to go visit them over New Years?" I nodded.

"Yeah, they asked me to come see their house and stay for a few days. My flight's Saturday afternoon and I come back Thursday morning and go right to work from the airport. Who knew any of this was going to happen?" We both smiled.

Kara rolled off the couch and climbed back on, straddling me. My heart pounded in my chest as we kissed. It felt like we might be in pre-launch mode for lovemaking. I was nervous. I admit it. I knew every bit of her body, loved it. And it was like our very first time - maybe worse because of the circumstances. There was still so much for us to talk about, to work out. It had to be done - for us. Sex was easy, given what it is. Hunger and loneliness were only part of the deal.

"Can we please make love?" Kara's tiny voice was plaintive.

"Are you ready to? It's more than just sex ya know. It has always been about intimacy for us; that and so much more. It was an outgrowth of all we are as women and as a couple. It's giving without worrying about getting. It's trusting. It's me... shutting up and kissing you." We giggled as we did.

I wasn't sure it was the right thing to do, but I unhooked her bra after my hands found their way under Kara's sweater. She did the rest, peeling both over her head and on the floor. Me next, then we went back to kissing. My lover felt perfectly familiar as well as perfect. I couldn't begin to tell you which of us was busier with our hands and mouths. There were tons of want mixed in with liters of desire, stirred at a feverish pace into what felt like molten aluminum. At least that's what the girl goo between my legs felt like.

"I don't really want to do this on a couch, lover."

"Yeah, me either. Care to join me in my web, little spider?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

There was no candlelight, no soft music, no stormy weather, no thunder and lightning. We were two women in love, trying to find our way in what had been a dream relationship that had been turned on its head.

After what was left of the clothing had been discarded and we'd pulled the blankets over us, we turned to each other again - for the first time.

As if it was ordained from on high, each of us started to cry. Big ole crocodile tears complete with tummy clenching sobs. It was as if we were so happy to be back together, in bed, in familiar surroundings, that everything that we may have held in was released. I know it was exactly that for me. I missed my honey - but you know that. She told me she'd missed me too. We were a couple of souls, so good together, so torn asunder for such silly reasons, and finally back together.

In some respects nothing had changed. Crying all done, we moved to and with each other. Fingers did what fingers do - deliciously. Mouths teased here and there as mouths will do. I would be more detailed in my descriptions but I have to admit - I was so wrapped up in the moment I honest to god can't remember much.

Other than this.

My want threatened to burst from my chest. Kara had stoked the furnace of my desire to a point the Titanic would have been jealous. I would have slid south of the border but I missed her kisses so much I let my fingers tease her soaked labia and high, proud clit. I know she felt my fingers curl in anticipation of diving into her depths; I felt her tense.

"Please. Don't. I... can't."

I froze. I mean that literally. I felt every bit of my body clench, unable to move - even my tongue, which withdrew.

In a whisper, I asked, "What is it, Kara?" She was trembling uncontrollably. That's the way it felt to confused me.

She shook her head and said, also in a whisper, "I'm not sure, Lissy. That's the thing. Every bit of my body is screaming for you." A hand grabbed my hair in a hard tug. "I want you. I need you to fuck me like there's no tomorrow. Like there will never be another time we'll be together. Like... the way I think I felt just about every day since that Sunday."

I nodded. I think I knew what she meant, but this Kara - I wasn't completely sure I knew what she thought, what she felt anymore. I had the feeling there were things she hadn't shared. Things she may not even know how to verbalize yet. I love her and I would move heaven and earth to help her. There was no way of knowing if that would prove to be enough.

"Try, please, if you can." I watched her eyes tear.

"I don't feel worthy of you making love to me. I thought she was you; it feels like I cheated on you. I despise her and I hate myself."

"She used you, manipulated you, drugged you. You haven't told me everything and I probably don't want to know it all. I know nothing about your time with Bette." I felt you shiver. "There are going to be all kinds of things. Each of us has different demons to deal with. I won't pretend to know all of yours and you don't need me to pile mine on top of yours."

I was overjoyed to feel Kara's body relax. It felt like what I said turned something loose in her. I kissed her.

She startled me when she said, "I wanted you to put your hand on my throat and choke me while we made love."

"I love you for sharing, blondie. Isn't this something new for us?" She nodded.

"There were lots of 'new' things I learned... not to mention some oldies and not exactly goodies." She shivered again.

"Well then, would you like to lead tonight? Surely your kitty and mine have been texting, begging." I saw the blue shine.

"My name is Kara, not Shirley." I groaned. "Yeah, I know; that was bad." The smile fell away and was replaced by a worried frown. "What am I going to do, Lissy? I don't have a job. I haven't paid any bills in I can't remember how long. It's great being home, seeing you, getting to be with you like this, and I'm scared. I'm scared of me, scared of you, scared of us, scared... really scared."

This wasn't a side of Kara that I'd seen before. 'It will all be okay' sounded extremely hollow to me. 'It will take time' felt right but it didn't address how to begin to put things back together.

"Does your building have a mail room?" She nodded. "What hours are they open?"

"3 to 8. Less on Saturdays. 11 to 2 I think."

"Okay, we'll change the plan then. We'll head out as soon as we have it. That will be okay, actually. I can call Rachel in the morning after we have breakfast."

"Do you still love me?" I was caught so off guard by the question that all I could do was stare, open mouthed, in shock. "It's okay; really it is. I don't blame you." With that, Kara turned away from me. What is going on here?

I scooted the few inches behind my blonde, threw an arm over her waist, and kissed her neck and shoulders.

"Kara, I wasn't myself when you weren't around. I was miserable and not much fun to be around. I was angry with you for keeping information from me. But I never stopped loving you, never stopped missing you. Barb and the big storm were a blessing in disguise. I was in the city and it meant I could come here to see you the next morning."

"You dated Becky. I should be angry about that I think, but it turns out she was in cahoots with Bette." I nodded.

"How did you meet her anyway?" Kara turned to her back.

"There was another Domme named Kelly I knew when I was with Bette. She's who I turned to when I got free of her the first time. She helped nurse me back to health. When I knew I wanted to be hurt I called Kelly. I knew she wouldn't help me get what I wanted, but I knew she'd take me to the club she frequents. I figured I could hook up with someone who might be able to give me what I wanted. Turns out Veronica was the one. She gave me a card. I never did find out how she spotted me in that dark, busy place." She looked at me with sad eyes. "I have no idea why you still love me."

She needs me to be strong. I may be dying inside but I can't show that to her. And I hate that I can't. She's so fragile.

"The woman I love is still in there, Kara. Your eyes show your hurt, your confusion. That's fine. Your heart is still there. They can't take that from you." I smiled. "You're going to have to do the majority of the work, lover, but I promise you I'll be right by your side every goddamn step of the way no matter how hard it gets - for you, for me, for us."

"How did I get so lucky to find you?" I laughed.

"You asked me that silly question at that banking thing that night." She smiled.

"Who knew?"

"Ain't that the truth, blondie! Neither of us could predict the arc this relationship has taken, that's for double damn sure."

I saw mirth and more in those blue eyes. She took my hand, which lay across her tummy now, and put it between her legs.

"It seems you want something, dearest."

"In the worst way. Please?"

There was no way I could ask again if she was sure. Besides, she'd put my hand on her sex. I rose up and gave her a kiss, which she accepted while lifting her hips against my hand. Smiling into the kiss, I cupped kitty a little more firmly and slid my fingers up and down the length of her. A throaty groan echoed what her body told me - she was more than ready.

I locked my pointer finger under my middle finger and pushed them into her. A muffled squeal and two hands in my hair told me I'd done good!! I sawed in and out slowly. Hands left my hair and pawed at Sally and Jesse. I stayed away from her clit intentionally. I hoped the explosion, when it came, would be overwhelming. We finally came up for air.

"Oh fuck I've missed this, baby. Please help me cum. My god, I need to so badly!" She pulled me to her mouth again.

We can start to fix things tomorrow, but for now, I'm going to make some mad love to the woman I love.

I slowed my fingers even more, which got a groan from blondie. She bit my tongue, the bitch! And laughed.

I got my 'revenge' by pushing my fingers as far inside her as I could. Yeah, she didn't like that too much!! I sped up the pace as well, which was met with groans of approval. Hips rocked in their attempt to meet the rapid thrusts of my fingers. I began to tease Ms. P. It seemed she'd missed us as well. Kara pulled her legs a little closer still to her butt and sped up the thrusting of her hips. I gave in and let my thumb slip and slide quickly over the pearl.

Kara pushed our mouths apart, panting.

"Oh fuck yes! Don't stop, baby, please god don't stop." She started to cry, even as her body told me she was approaching climax. The sobs continued as she bucked furiously, right hand grabbing at her breast, left hand tight in my hair.

Wailing, she said, "Ooooohhhhh godddddddddddd yessssssssss. Thank you, thank you, thank you baby."

Kitty gushed, her walls spasming around my fingers. Kara's breaths came in short pants as the orgasm rolled through her. I used my fingers and thumb to keep her on the high peak of her bliss and felt it slip away before her body began relax.

I had been crying through much of it. Soft sobs of joy, so happy to be back with my honey, beyond glad to be sharing a bit of intimacy after all the months of idiocy. Life is tough enough as it is. Why we create our own little hell in the middle of heaven with the one we love will always be a mystery to me. Whitney Houston's 'I will always love you' came to mind.

It took some time for her to recover and when it did, Kara crawled on top of me, eyes gleaming. Rut roh!

"Hi. I'm Kara and you're about to get fucked." I shivered. She attacked me and I mean that literally. She kissed me while her fingers tore at my neck, breasts and torso. She carved ridges in me with her nails; it really hurt, as they were anything but smooth. I whimpered, which only seemed to inflame her. Her mouth moved from mine to my neck and throat. The kisses were soft, but her teeth were anything but. I cried out more than once and not from pleasure. I was squirming as I tried to figure out where she was going next with her assault. I had finally had enough.

"Kara, you're hurting me!" I felt her freeze. "I want you to make love to me, lover, but some of what you're doing hurts." She never moved a muscle, just lay on top of me, never moving a muscle and never saying a word. "Say something!"

She responded with fury, hitting me, slapping me. Startled at first, I fought back, trying, as much as anything, to get away from this psychotic whirlwind. I had no choice but to hit her, at first open-handed, but in frustration - and it pains me to admit it but it's the truth - eventually I had to ball my fist and hit her as hard as I knew how. She yelped and fell off of me. I hurried to a corner of the bed that was as far away from her as I could get, sitting, breathing hard, and trembling.

"What's wrong with you!!" I screamed it at the top of my lungs. I was trembling, scared, unsure of what to do next. If I called 911 I was pretty sure they'd arrest her and I didn't even want to think about the impact of that on her psyche.

"What was that all about, Kara? You have to talk to me!!" I hadn't meant it to but it came out as a screech. "You scared me. I'm so sorry for hitting you like I did but I didn't have any choice. You were hurting me." She lay on the bed in a fetal curl, her back to me.

I have no idea how much time passed. Not a word was said. The condo wasn't exactly cold but I sure in the hell was. I hopped off the bed, hurried to the bathroom, grabbed a robe for me, grabbed the other and hurried back to the bed. I pushed my arms into the robe and tied the sash.

I walked around the bed to where Kara lay, still curled in a tight ball. She looked so little and so vulnerable. I felt myself blink back tears and bent over to give her a kiss, laying the robe over her as I did.

"I don't know what's wrong, Kara. I love you and I will not leave you. We need to talk; I'll be here when you're ready."

"Go away. Go home. Leave me alone. I'll just hurt you or hurt myself."

I had turned around at the first words, covered my mouth as she went on, and came back and stood in front of her when she finished. Not wanting to talk down to her, literally, I bent to my knees so I could look in her eyes, swollen and red.

"I'm not leaving. I'm not going away. I'm going home tomorrow - with you. You've hurt me; I've hurt you. That's in the past. We have to deal with that past just like we have to deal with this present. And we will - together." A burst of energy made me turn her to her back. Blue eyes showed surprise, followed quickly by hot, dark anger.

"Be mad at me if you want; I really don't care. But be mad at me for the right reasons, not for turning you on your back."

It was as if my words opened the last valve in a dam. She started crying like I'd never seen her cry before. Big, gulping sobs. I saw her tummy clench from the effort. She turned away from me, brought her knees up to her breasts, and hugged herself - again. I had NO idea what was wrong, what I had said that unleashed this torrent of tears. I crawled on the bed behind the woman I would spend the rest of my life with and hugged her. I had no tears to shed. I love her. That's it!

*

Author's Notes:

This chapter, like the others, is a work of fiction. The response to the first two chapters has been overwhelming. Thank you all so much for your votes, comments, and emails. I've been battling computer issues since Sunday so this may post a bit late. My apologies for any delay.

I've mentioned that a story of this length is likely to have a few words misspelled. I write, I edit, and I have someone very capable proof. And still things get missed. Please make allowances for the human factor.

I adore interaction with those who choose to read my stories. If you are interested in a little more 'Vixen,' please check my bio. And won't you please vote and please consider leaving a comment. I honestly don't mind constructive criticism. It can and does help.

There was quite a bit of surprise and dismay about the ending of Chapter Six. It was very difficult to write. I understand the hue and cry. As much as anything I'm grateful that my writing can evoke that kind of emotion in my readers. Whether you read, comment and vote anonymously or with a moniker, I appreciate each of you very much. I put a lot of work into my writing and I'm constantly experimenting and trying to grow. Thank you for reading. ~ AVL ~