Mom's Diaries

I stood beneath the hot spray of the shower, my prick firmly in hand as I slowly worked it, maintaining its firmness though it took little effort in doing so. I was hard as a rock and now horny as hell. My heart felt like it was beating a thousand miles an hour as I stood there listening, finally hearing her as she actually stopped and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Jack honey? I'm back!" Mom called into me. It was now or never.

"Mom?"

"Yes honey?"

"I forgot to get some fresh towels before stepping into the shower, would you mind getting me a new one?" I asked.

There was only the briefest of pauses, but there was one. I knew she was standing there thinking about what I'd just asked.

"Sure honey...be right back," she said and then walked down the hallway towards the linen cupboard.

I knew that the glass doors on the tub enclosure where opaque just enough to offer up some small measure of privacy. She would no doubt be able to make out the outline of my nude form inside the shower itself, but nothing too revealingly. Not unless I either pressed myself against it, or allowed it to remain at least partially open. I slid it back just a couple of inches, no more than that. But in having done so, I knew that should she stand anywhere's near the doorway to the bathroom, that she would in fact be able to see in.

The other problem was, even if she brought the fresh towels into the bathroom, I needed some additional excuse to keep her in there after she had. Which immediately came to me, just as she entered.

"Here they are," she said as I heard her open the door as I'd expected, stepping in. "I'll hang them up for you."

I knew as she did so, she could see me through the glass of the shower doors, though not clearly. Perhaps a hint of my erection poking out in front of me, which I then purposely turned to one side ensuring at least that she might. I heard her placing the towels, and smiled inwardly as she took an inordinate amount of time doing so.

"So...you get everything done you went out to do?" I asked attempting to keep some sort of dialogue and conversation going here. "I got everything done on my end," I added waiting for her response. I got it in the form of her actually sitting down on the toilet seat, as I too could just make out her presence on the other side of the glass doors.

"Yep, all done. Picked up a few things for the drive up tomorrow," she now added. We had planned on driving up, not only for the weekend, but for an additional three days to spend some time visiting with my aunt since my return. I was sad that Jill wouldn't be there, as she was upstate attending school at a local university up there. But I wasn't too surprised by that either as Jill and I hadn't exactly parted on the best of terms when I had originally left. Still...I was anxious and looking forward to seeing my aunt once again even then.

"You still been going up at least once a month to visit with her?" I asked.

"That...or she's actually been coming here to see me if I couldn't make it up there...so yes," mom replied. "Though I thought it was only fair that we go there this time, especially as it's been a while since you've been there." As she spoke, I now saw her stand up, and knew she was making to leave.

"Damn!"

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"I got soap in my eyes, I can't see...and it burns," I said quickly not knowing what else I could have come up with.

"Aren't you using that new shampoo I bought?"

"No...I guess not, where is it?"

I then heard her open the cabinet door beneath the sink. "Here it is," she said and then approached the shower door where she now stood, her hand coming through the opening though she was careful not to position herself so she could see clearly in. But I could see that she was peeking without trying to make it too obvious as I stood there rubbing my eyes with my fists.

"Can you grab me a washcloth too? I still can't get the soap out of my eyes," I informed her, pretending I hadn't seen her hand as she stood there holding out the bottle to me. Once again I heard her open a drawer searching for the cloth. She laughed when she did. "What?"

"Oh nothing," she snickered. "I guess it's just nice to feel like I'm still needed is all," she said laughing. "Grown man with soap in his eyes acting like a young kid again is all," she finished still chuckling.

"Yeah well, it burns," I responded even though it really didn't. I'd also managed to accomplish one other feat, as had been my intent. I wasn't exactly full on erect now. Not like I had been, certainly not enough to appear obscenely aroused, but not exactly flaccid either. I knew as she opened the sliding door a bit wider this time in order to hand over the cloth, still holding the bottle of shampoo, that this time she could see me quite clearly as I turned towards her in order to accept it.

"Goodness," she said surprising herself perhaps when she did.

"What?" I said once again.

"Well...for one, you're certainly not modest these days," she said as I stood there knowing full well I was facing her.

"Must be the service, got used to standing around naked in front of a lot of people," I replied.

"Yes well, I doubt any of those were women...and certainly not your own mother," she told me, though I noticed she made no effort to move away from the door as I stood there scrubbing at my eyes with the washcloth as though unaware that she still was.

"Well, you're the one who told me that there was nothing to be ashamed about," I began. "Remember? And especially now, being grown up and all, no reason for me to be embarrassed by your seeing me, no differently than I wouldn't be embarrassed at seeing you."

She paused once again digesting that perhaps. "Yes...except if you remember correctly, we weren't actually discussing naked bodies, but something else a bit more intimate in nature as I recall."

Now it was my turn to laugh, though I immediately felt my cock stiffen, and knew as it did that she could now easily see it doing so. I held my head beneath the water for a moment, and then opened my eyes glancing in her direction. Sure enough...she was looking down at my rapidly stiffening cock.

I noticed her face was flushed, and her chest seemed to be heaving up and down a bit more noticeably as well as she breathed in and out.

"That's true," I laughed as she now looked up into my eyes. "And to be perfectly honest about it...that was what I was actually doing when I got soap in my eyes."

"You...you were?" Mom asked a catch in her throat as she once again looked down at my now full on erection.

"Yeah, I admit, I was feeling a bit horny...especially these days," I freely admitted, seeing the surprise in her eyes that we were actually now having this conversation. "It's been a while since I've been with anyone..." I told her, once again catching her off guard. I had dated a couple of women while away, but even then the sex with each had been less than satisfactory, and I certainly hadn't been looking for any long-term relationships either. "What about you mom?"

Already off balance as it was, my question seemed to make her even more so.

"What...what do you mean?"

"What do you think I mean?" I chuckled back, still trying to keep it light and open between us. "I know that you've certainly not been seeing anyone, at least anyone you've told me about...but I can't believe for a moment you still don't have the urges or desires. You're still too attractive, too good looking a woman not to."

She again blushed, evading the question perhaps by asking another. "You really think so? Think I'm still attractive enough to entice someone?" She asked.

"Yes, of course you are. But you are at least masturbating yes? I mean honest mom, it's not healthy if you're not at least doing that. I know for a fact, that men and women both, if they go too long without having an orgasm, experiencing pleasure, it really can affect their health in a fairly serious way."

She stood for a moment without speaking. Her hand coming up to grab the side of the shower glass door as though needing the additional support. I was almost positive that she now did as her chest continued to rise and fall a bit quicker than normal. This conversation was obviously having an effect on her after all.

"Sometimes," she said now looking down and away from me, speaking softly as she said it, admitting it. "But...it has been a while for me too," she added.

"Well then you should."

Once again she laughed, blushing even more. "Oh sure...maybe I should just head off to my bedroom, close the door and get myself off, is that what you're actually telling me I should do?"

"Well no...not exactly. I was thinking more along the lines of you just doing it here...while I watched, while you watched me."

I hadn't honestly intended to take it this far. Or to so openly pose or make the suggestion. But I was, and had been truly and honestly aroused, even more so now knowing what I knew. My advantage was in knowing that, knowing what my own mother's secret private thoughts about me had been. And though that indeed might have changed by now, I was gambling on the fact that they hadn't.

She tried laughing it off as though I was teasing her, joking around with her, until she saw me reach down, grabbing my cock as I stood there stroking myself in front of her.

"Jack, you're not...you can't be...serious. Are you? I mean...I am after all...your mother!"

"Yes I know that, and you're my very beautiful, very attractive mother too. And I've been standing here for a while now, imagining you inside my head. There, I've said it. I've admitted it. I've been enjoying myself while thinking about you, trying to remember the way you looked when I've seen you naked before."

"You have? I mean...you are? You did? When?"

I was scrambling here, trying to come up with something specific, and decided to try bluffing my way through it. See if I could get her to buy into it if I could.

"Just days before I left," I stated hoping I'd come close to some sort of truth, using the information I now had, making a few assumptions perhaps, but fairly certain that in doing so, I wasn't that far off the mark.

"When? When did you see me...see me doing that?" She pressed, though as she did, I could hear an edge of excitement in her words.

"Remember how you used to sit down stairs late in the evening reading a book?" Which was true, she always did. But I knew as her eyes widened, I was closer to the truth than I actually realized, and decided to see if I could trick her into admitting to me now that she actually did.

"Yes..." she spoke softly almost quietly.

"Well, one night, I woke up thirsty, decided to come down stairs and get something to drink. I noticed it was later than usual, and the table lamp was still on. I thought maybe you had fallen asleep while sitting there reading, so I approached the stairs quietly not wanting to wake you. And then I saw you. I stood there and watched you, watched you as you fingered yourself."

"Oh my god! You did? You...you caught me masturbating?"

"Yeah I did, and it was hot too mom! You looked so sensual, so erotic sitting there touching yourself. And because you did, I then found I couldn't help myself, so I stood there on the stairs without your knowing I was, and stroked myself off while I watched you."

"Right there? On the stairs?" It was obvious she was trying to look back and remember if she'd heard anything, obviously she thought she was being careful.

"In fact...you almost caught me I think. I barely turned around and got back up out of sight when you turned to look. But the fact was, I actually wished you had. I had secretly wanted you to see me, see me standing there jerking off, knowing full well I was thinking of you when I did. Just like I am now..." I said once again drawing her attention back to my hard fucking cock, which I now fisted pleasurably for her as she stood there watching me do it. "Just like...you are now," I finished.

"But I'm..."

"My mother. Yes...I know. But it doesn't change the fact that I enjoyed seeing you, that I enjoy thinking about you, or that I'm thinking about you now in fact. And that more than anything, right now...I wish you'd take off your clothes, let me see you, see you masturbate yourself again while I do, while you likewise watch me."

I knew that her resolve was crumbling, but it could easily have gone back the other way as well. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights and could have very easily jumped in the other direction.

It was then that I reached out my hand, pulling her into the shower with me even though she was dressed. She squealed in shock and surprise, but it was a flirtatious cry, almost welcoming that I had. Especially when I pulled her towards me, her full breasts now pressed against me, the water having thoroughly soaked her blouse making it adhere to her along with everything else. I likewise knew, she could feel the press of my hard cock digging into her belly as I held her, and then suddenly without warning leaned over kissing her as we stood there.

She basically melted there in my arms. We kissed again, our tongues now coming forward to fence playfully together. As we did that, I allowed my hands to come up, each one cupping her still covered, but very wet and very hard tipped breasts as I began thumbing each one of her hard taut nipples through her blouse.

I now felt her own hands reaching up, quickly parting the buttons on her blouse until I peeled it away from her, dropping it there in the bottom of the shower stall, along with her bra, which came next. Her shorts, and then panties soon followed until she stood there in front of me just as naked as I was. Now cupping one of her breasts directly, I tenderly began playing with, and flicking her nipple. With my other hand, I allowed it to trail down her belly, slowly teasing her almost agonizingly so before resting it against the soft furrow of her mound. I felt her sudden intake of breath as I did, and then parted the sea of her pussy, my finger just then probing her moist depths.

"Jack, Jack honey...we shouldn't," she said only now trying to resist the urge. "It isn't..."

"What? Right? I think it is...because it feels right. It's something I've always wanted to do...and besides mom, all we're doing is touching...it's not like I'm doing anything else to you at the moment, like licking your pussy, or actually fucking you with my cock."

She groaned at that, as though feeling like I was. "But...only this then, nothing else...just, just..."

I placed her hand on my cock, felt her fingers wrapping themselves around and about it. Once again my own hand slipping back down between her legs, where I found even more moisture sitting there waiting for me than there was even a moment or two ago.

"Stroke it, play with it...jerk it off," I said lustfully, breathing against her neck, "while I caress your tits, finger-fuck your pussy," I once again breathed hotly against her, now kissing and nipping at the softness of her neck.

"Oh fuck, fuck!" she moaned in response as my fingers began toying with her clit, as her hand began sliding up and down the length of my cock, exploring it, teasing it with the tips of her fingers. "Oh Jack...Jack! Make me cum baby...please, make me cum!"

The moment I felt her give way, the moment her inner muscles suddenly began to spasm around my finger, clenching it inside, her low deep-throated moan of release triggered my own. I felt my cock throb, as she did, her hand pulling upwards on it holding it there briefly as the first powerful spurt of my cock filled the palm of her hand. She stroked down again, pumping out another, just as my own finger flicked her clit like a light-switch, sending yet another powerful jolt through her cunt, just as my cock lurched shooting off again. I felt the second even more powerful spurt leap from my cock. She looked down, now watching it as I squirted against her thigh, her belly. My fingers now pinching her clit, holding it there as I worked it as though jerking it off. Her knees nearly buckled with the effort of maintaining her balance as I too began feeling light-headed with the intensity of my own orgasm.

We stood for long moments there beneath the shower, still holding one another trying to collect our breaths. Eventually she stepped out, and began drying herself off as I did. She turned away briefly, embarrassed, perhaps guilt trying to force its way into her thoughts.

Not about to allow that, I stepped up behind her once again, my hands coming around to secure her breasts, cupping them and easily feeling the press of her nipples against the palms.

"Jack!"

"Shh," I said kissing her neck. "I'm home now...it's where I want to be...with you. And I fully intend on doing this again, every chance that I get. So don't try and convince me to do otherwise. Because mother...I can't."

**

I heard the soft click on her bedroom door telling me she had locked it shortly after she left the bathroom. I considered knocking, but then thought better of it. Perhaps I had indeed crossed the line, forced too much to happen too quickly. But even if I had, it was too late to do anything about it now. Sequestered with her own thoughts, all I could do now was give her the time to do that, to think things through for herself, and then abide by whatever decision she came to, whenever she finally did.

She sat upstairs in her bedroom for a good two hours while I in turn sat downstairs in the living room, the TV on, though for the life of me I didn't remember watching it. All I knew was, when she finally did open her door and came back down, she would have reached a decision about everything that had happened. All I could do now, was sit and wait.

When I finally did hear the door, I knew that moment had arrived. Hearing her descent down the stairs, I turned towards her looking up expectantly. Immediately relieved to see a smile on her face as I did, though even that didn't give anything away.

"You hungry?" She asked reaching the landing.

"Famished," I responded back, now standing. "What can I do to help?"

"How about keeping me company while I fix something?" She suggested, and then kissed me lovingly on the cheek, more like a mom would, which I took as a hint at her decision. It was then however that she actually took me by the hand and led me into the kitchen area. "Pour us a glass of wine while I fix us some dinner," she told me. "And...while we chat," she then added.

After pouring our wine, I walked over handing one to her, and then attempted to lean forward and kiss her again after I had. She turned her head however, accepting it on the cheek instead.

"Before things get too carried away here Jack, we really do need to talk."

Resigned, I walked back over to the kitchen table sitting down on the side, facing her all the while sipping my wine, though I don't recall tasting it. I waited on her without speaking as she screwed up the courage to do so.

"I still haven't been able to come to any agreement with myself about what happened," she began, as she now turned away from the stove, steeling herself perhaps and taking a sip of her wine. "But...I'm also not going to deny the fact I didn't enjoy it. Because I did."

I smiled inwardly. It was more than I expected to hear at this point, expecting to have heard otherwise, though even then she still came pretty close to that.

"But, just because I did enjoy it, doesn't mean it should ever happen again either," she told me. "I might not be able to control myself...if it did."

"So don't," I finally said in response to that. "I certainly don't want to." I was already becoming aroused again, just thinking about it. And especially looking at her as she stood there. She had obviously changed clothes, putting on what I had come to affectionately call as her "comfy" clothes. A pair of my old sweat pants, which she'd cut off into a pair of shorts. Shorts, which were almost too short, even for her. And then a lightweight, though baggy sweatshirt, which was, also mine. And I knew damn well as she stood there, she had nothing else on beneath it, save for a pair of bikini panties perhaps, though nothing more. The way her breasts fell, pressing against the material of the sweat-top told me that much. And I noticed that her eyes naturally gravitated towards my crotch as she looked at me, as though remembering what she'd once seen, held, and watched squirt as I came in her hand.